Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

achillesJC123

Online | Search for a member

achillesJC123

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4385
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

achillesJC123's page activity

Visits<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 3:23am<b>lulubelles</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 4:21pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 1:20pm<b>mr_sarcastic416</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 11:36pm<b>foxykz</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 5:32pm

achillesJC123's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of achillesJC123's badges

achillesJC123's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my mom showing her friends that she can deepthroat a banana. That's something I could've lived a long and happy life without seeing. FML

#21141912
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52017) - you deserved it (5033)

On 05/16/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by fuck florida (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21141738
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52487) - you deserved it (7349)

On 05/16/2014 at 12:01pm - intimacy - by (not) fucked - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

#21138395
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49205) - you deserved it (7537)

On 05/13/2014 at 1:42am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML

#21137666
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58498) - you deserved it (5679)

On 05/12/2014 at 12:01pm - love - by bambam - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58854) - you deserved it (5038)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML

#21137290
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48451) - you deserved it (4419)

On 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by Gone With the Wind - United States (Nebraska)

Today, was my first day of work in my life. I was excited, and so was my dad, who saw me to the door and ruffled my hair as he wished me luck. I didn't notice until half an hour after arriving at work that he'd stuck his gum in my hair. Nobody bothered to tell me. FML

#21136840
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43671) - you deserved it (3810)

On 05/11/2014 at 4:30pm - work - by sheisselluv (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I love him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

#21136683
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40734) - you deserved it (4892)

On 05/11/2014 at 1:57pm - love - by not gay in AL (man) - United States

Today, a customer asked me how long our 6-inch sandwich was. FML

#21136526
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42700) - you deserved it (4593)

On 05/11/2014 at 10:46am - work - by Makeitdance - United States (California)

Today, after a long day at work, I was starving, so I stopped by the drive-through for something to eat. When I got home and hurriedly opened the bag, all I found inside was napkins. Thanks, McDonald's. FML

#21136073
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41910) - you deserved it (10068)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:34pm - work - by can't eat paper - United States

Today, I was looking at some cellphones with my dad, when an assistant asked if we needed help. My dad said, "Yeah, does this have parental controls? My son watches some freaky stuff, some damn freaky stuff." I don't watch anything weird, but thanks for humiliating me, dad. FML

#21135688
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39604) - you deserved it (4095)

On 05/10/2014 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom made a Facebook post about me starting my period and for everyone to be nice to me. FML

#21135508
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51540) - you deserved it (4496)

On 05/10/2014 at 9:35am - misc - by ColoredPencil13 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML

#21135087
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44227) - you deserved it (3704)

On 05/09/2014 at 7:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

#21134481
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46856) - you deserved it (6317)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: