Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

achillesJC123

Offline (the 01/12/2016 at 3:59am) | Search for a member

achillesJC123

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 July 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13265
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

achillesJC123's page activity

Visits<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:26am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:35am<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 1:57pm<b>arabian22</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 5:01am<b>aloha_oe</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:57am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 9:35am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 4:36am<b>noelsom7</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:19pm<b>rieebee</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 1:56pm<b>FmyL6</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:09pm<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 3:23am<b>lulubelles</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 4:21pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 1:20pm<b>mr_sarcastic416</b> - the 05/08/2013 at 11:36pm<b>foxykz</b> - the 02/05/2013 at 5:32pm

Fucked!<b>arabian22</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 12:06pm

achillesJC123's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of achillesJC123's badges

achillesJC123's favorite FMLs

Today, at the restaurant where I work, a guest choked on a bone from her crosscut ribs. She asked me to bring the manager over, so I did. When he got there, she complained that the bone could have seriously injured her, and we should be more careful of where we put the bones in the ribs. FML

#21256772
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42461) - you deserved it (2970)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:05am - work - by Diachronic (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I confiscated a 1st grader's cell phone. It was better than anything I could come close to affording. FML

#21256659
153 comments

Today, my mother yelled at me for not doing all of my homework. She got so mad, she tore up a drawing I'd spent over a week working on. That was my art homework. FML

#21253019
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47331) - you deserved it (3612)

On 09/06/2014 at 1:25pm - misc - by StillPissedOffAtIrony (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

#21252552
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49642) - you deserved it (2955)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by almost governmental (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for jokingly telling her to get back in the kitchen. After we finally made peace and I told her that I fully respect women, I turned on my stereo. The song's first words? "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." Cue second argument. FML

#21252547
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38083) - you deserved it (18401)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45775) - you deserved it (3695)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45852) - you deserved it (9211)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44865) - you deserved it (10806)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44711) - you deserved it (3682)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I almost got lucky with a girl from my course. We've been flirting since we met. After removing her top and moving downwards with my tongue, whilst moaning my name she decided to mention she has a boyfriend and that we needed to stop. FML

#21248283
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53784) - you deserved it (6081)

On 08/30/2014 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39338) - you deserved it (9930)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49882) - you deserved it (3335)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said "nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML

#21247278
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41311) - you deserved it (3356)

On 08/28/2014 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

#21246644
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39030) - you deserved it (7232)

On 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, a schoolmate I've always secretly hated came over to my place to hang out. She found her way to my room and instantly noticed my dartboard, which I'd taped a picture of her face onto. FML

#21246638
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22065) - you deserved it (45168)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:57pm - misc - by Woops (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: