Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

acetl87

Search for a member

acetl87

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1840
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

acetl87's page activity

Visits<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 3:26pm<b>DavidKnows</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 1:47pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 10:33am<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 1:12pm<b>uarudeassbitchyo</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 12:01am<b>jcross01</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:42pm<b>ewang_</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:24am<b>TraceCase_</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:05am<b>dre82</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 9:30am<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 2:41am<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:36pm<b>pompomkiwi</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:56am<b>FracturedMinds</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 1:39pm<b>muzy</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 4:17pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 5:20pm<b>sugarbooboo63</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 3:30am<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 7:44pm<b>Mcculln82</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 12:25pm

acetl87's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of acetl87's badges

acetl87's favorite FMLs

Today, for my boyfriend's 19th birthday, I decided to dress up as a sexy cat girl for him, complete with ears, tail, matching sexy underwear, collar and leash. He wouldn't stop laughing. FML

#13515175
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15820) - you deserved it (34141)

On 10/19/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by failed_catgirl (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, at work, I leaned back in a chair too far, causing me to tip over and smash my head into a wall. If that wasn't enough damage, my boss keeps replaying the security footage to everyone I work with. My head hurts not from the fall, but the loud laughter that keeps coming from inside the office. FML

#12987645
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12907) - you deserved it (19558)

On 09/10/2010 at 6:02am - work - by hard_headed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my doctor told me I had "abnormally large breasts." This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't a 20 year old man. FML

#12922106
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26594) - you deserved it (6958)

On 09/05/2010 at 8:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to my English bulldog standing over me, getting ready to pee. I didn't move in time. FML

#12225863
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28192) - you deserved it (4967)

On 07/31/2010 at 12:28pm - misc - by Monkey (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out how much it hurts to be shot with a paintball in your open mouth. My mouth was only open to say I was hit. FML

#12072819
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29511) - you deserved it (6801)

On 07/23/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by owowowow - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I took my driving test for the first time. The instructor stopped it after less than ten minutes, and insisted she drive back to the test centre "in the interest of public safety." FML

#12000759
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10997) - you deserved it (36279)

On 07/20/2010 at 9:33am - misc - by Speedy (woman) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocked on the door and introduced himself with a smile, saying he wanted to know my "schedule." I replied, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he replied, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML

#11960471
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21855) - you deserved it (18261)

On 07/18/2010 at 10:18am - misc - by holly (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37316) - you deserved it (9672)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML

#6194907
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18120) - you deserved it (1963)

On 11/07/2009 at 11:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

#5964680
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30729) - you deserved it (6531)

On 10/23/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was sitting in my bed drinking Yoohoo from a juice box. I decided it would be fun to see how much I could fit in my mouth. As soon as my mouth was full, I sneezed. FML

#5948720
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8506) - you deserved it (36024)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a weight loss 'before and after' advertisement and I wished I could at least look like the 'before'. FML

#5301983
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33099) - you deserved it (21566)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a great time with a girl I liked. I asked her out and she said yes. She also said she cuts herself and if I ever broke up with her, I'll be responsible for her death. FML

#5098537
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65528) - you deserved it (5963)

On 09/07/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by BoredRunner42 - United States (California)

Today, as I got into an elevator, I spotted a little old lady hobbling desperately to get on. I frantically tapped on the 'door open' button but the doors closed. I got dirty looks from the people in the lift, only then did I realise I had frantically tapped the 'door close' button instead. FML

#4805621
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22349) - you deserved it (29619)

On 08/25/2009 at 5:17am - misc - by ElevatorThug (man) - Singapore

Today, I was smoking a cigarette while watching the meteor shower. I was just about at the filter and as I was taking my last drag, my friend decided to scare me from behind, and I accidentally sucked the whole thing in my mouth. They don't go out immediately when in your mouth. My tongue hurts. FML

#4495207
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21582) - you deserved it (51050)

On 08/13/2009 at 3:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: