Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

acetl87

Search for a member

acetl87

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2096
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

acetl87's page activity

Visits<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 3:26pm<b>DavidKnows</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 1:47pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 10:33am<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 1:12pm<b>uarudeassbitchyo</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 12:01am<b>jcross01</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:42pm<b>ewang_</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:24am<b>TraceCase_</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:05am<b>dre82</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 9:30am<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 2:41am<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:36pm<b>pompomkiwi</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:56am<b>FracturedMinds</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 1:39pm<b>muzy</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 4:17pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 5:20pm<b>sugarbooboo63</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 3:30am<b>_ansley_2013</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 7:44pm<b>Mcculln82</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 12:25pm

acetl87's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of acetl87's badges

acetl87's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

#19682048
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33430) - you deserved it (9055)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:15am - intimacy - by ilovemymomma - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#19602885
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19891) - you deserved it (4579)

On 05/10/2012 at 3:14pm - misc - by Amy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML

Today, I found out the bed I sleep in is the bed I was conceived in. FML

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

#18633962
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29639) - you deserved it (21234)

On 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I took a poop that was three states of matter. Solid, liquid, and gas. FML

#18507550
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22717) - you deserved it (7200)

On 12/13/2011 at 10:45pm - health - by brownunderwear - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend used a laser pointer to show me where I needed to lose weight. FML

#18329759
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31249) - you deserved it (5540)

On 11/23/2011 at 6:54pm - health - by chunkymonkey (woman) -

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

#17906295
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36171) - you deserved it (10961)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I went to school without makeup. No one recognized me. FML

#17781243
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15547) - you deserved it (39694)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:16pm - misc - by Nicole - United States (California)

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

#17686832
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40547) - you deserved it (27753)

On 09/07/2011 at 4:51am - intimacy - by sadsadperson (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML

#17577684
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29321) - you deserved it (4553)

On 08/25/2011 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by shocked (man) - United States

Today, I was having a chat with a customer. He asked if I was married, to which I replied, "No." Before I could say anything else, he said, "Thought so. You look too happy to be married." I was about to mention that I just got engaged. FML

#17513868
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25460) - you deserved it (3213)

On 08/18/2011 at 10:10pm - love - by ddeit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37765) - you deserved it (3006)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

#17447833
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43289) - you deserved it (6401)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:44am - animals - by squishylog - United States (California)

Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML

#17438082
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26656) - you deserved it (4954)

On 08/11/2011 at 4:45am - kids - by IRum (man) - Russian Federation



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: