About aceman1992 :
About aceman1992 :
aceman1992's FML badges
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
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aceman1992's favorite FMLs
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML
by haunted / 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by Roxas / 02/14/2011 at 12:20am / United States (Virginia) / Transportation
Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
by omnomnom / 02/04/2011 at 7:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by R-R-R-Ray / 09/25/2009 at 10:37am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Intimacy
Today, I tried to befriend the lonely boy who sits at the end of my table at lunch. He always sleeps or does homework during lunch. I walked over to him, tripped, and spilled my open bottle of water on his jeans. I apologized profusely and wiped off his pants with napkins. He got hard. FML
by brighteyes / 01/31/2009 at 12:01pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by Noname / 10/30/2008 at 1:55am / Work
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