Zomg_Okay

Search for a member

Offline (the 12/21/2014 at 2:29am)

Zomg_Okay

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1935 (81 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10320
  • Number of comments : 1128
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Zomg_Okay's page activity

Visits<b>Aerobic_Exorcism</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:15am<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 7:56pm<b>legodude28</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 6:25pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 2:05am<b>elle_14221</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 5:22pm<b>amberdea404</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 12:24am<b>smeegle</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:57pm<b>BigC_from_Bama</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 5:51pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 11:17am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Tommy214</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 12:01am<b>Oihana</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 3:51pm<b>max367</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 11:45am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:16am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:08am<b>fockeygirl</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:37am<b>myselfkk</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 11:36am

Fucked!<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 8:05am<b>Radgears47</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 9:10am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:08pm

Zomg_Okay's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Zomg_Okay's badges

Zomg_Okay's favorite FMLs

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

by mr_loveless / 02/11/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Love

Today, my dad opened a Chinese fortune cookie that read, "Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes." Now he won't stop calling me Experience. FML

by Experience / 02/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

by Kitten_Love / 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm / Animals

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

by andy / 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my school's ski trip got canceled, because "All the snow makes the roads unsafe." We can't go skiing because it's snowing. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2013 at 5:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was upset because my brother, who I'm very close to, didn't call me for my birthday yesterday. I told my mom about it, and we both immediately went silent on the phone, as we both realized she forgot to call me yesterday as well. FML

by birthday_loser / 01/23/2013 at 2:33pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

by no sleep for me / 01/08/2013 at 2:44am / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

by catdog / 01/02/2013 at 1:07am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 5:30am / United States (Kansas) / Health

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy