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Zomg_Okay

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Zomg_Okay

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1935 (79 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5013
  • Number of comments : 1108
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Zomg_Okay's page activity

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Zomg_Okay's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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Zomg_Okay's favorite FMLs

Today, it's Christmas day. Normally, my family would be opening gifts right now. Instead, my mom is holding our gifts hostage until we clean the house. Apparently, "The presents aren't going anywhere." FML

#18606973
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13265) - you deserved it (25213)

On 12/25/2011 at 12:06pm - misc - by John Nani (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

#18542050
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47399) - you deserved it (2169)

On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31460) - you deserved it (5874) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML

#18534964
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31460) - you deserved it (5874) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/17/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by espylone - France

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

#18531059
175 comments

Today, my landlord came and beat on my door demanding the rent check. I just got home from a trip and my wife was supposed to pay it while I was away. What happened to the money? Black Friday. FML

#18515072
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26906) - you deserved it (3344)

On 12/14/2011 at 9:46pm - money - by kittyslayer (man) - United States

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39915) - you deserved it (9431)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML

#18391386
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35129) - you deserved it (8054)

On 11/30/2011 at 1:43am - intimacy - by me - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

#18378519
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24096) - you deserved it (5017)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31146) - you deserved it (15524)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the recycling bin caught fire. My little brother was "experimenting" with his magnifying glass, set an egg carton on fire and didn't realise you had to put it out before throwing it in the bin. FML

#18354691
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20695) - you deserved it (2056)

On 11/26/2011 at 6:38am - kids - by Annon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11888) - you deserved it (56236)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31296) - you deserved it (3276)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to teach my dog tricks. Somehow, I thought it would be easier if I physically showed my dog how to roll, so I rolled on the floor in front of my dog. My sister recorded me and posted it on Facebook. Now everyone thinks I'm an idiot and my dog still can't roll. FML

#18324094
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15317) - you deserved it (20401)

On 11/23/2011 at 3:19am - animals - by bonertoolong - United States (Texas)

Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML

#18323585
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22854) - you deserved it (9028)

On 11/23/2011 at 1:40am - health - by OCDrunk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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