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Zomg_Okay

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Zomg_Okay

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1935 (79 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5983
  • Number of comments : 1125
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Zomg_Okay's page activity

Visits<b>MsMarti</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 12:15am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 9:23am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 5:11am<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 4:09pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:40am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 2:02am<b>zoegirl_455</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 12:38am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 8:19pm<b>harrypotter322</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:42pm<b>ThisSummer</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:49pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 10:48am<b>FrenchieJoking</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:32pm<b>murphy30011</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:40pm<b>triSARAtopsRAWR</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 2:22am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:54pm<b>jag0025</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:41pm<b>LittleBells</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:41pm<b>greenbucket</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:55pm

Zomg_Okay's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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Zomg_Okay's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27568) - you deserved it (3137)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend became a magician. His best trick? The disappearing act. FML

#21292946
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30160) - you deserved it (3352)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:11pm - love - by highheelcyanide (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36405) - you deserved it (10604)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

#21267077
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32133) - you deserved it (3551)

On 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm - health - by jazzie7719 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to find a huge zit directly between my two eyebrows. My friends have started calling me "The North Star." FML

#21253662
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34914) - you deserved it (3235)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35623) - you deserved it (8719)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37597) - you deserved it (6750)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48258) - you deserved it (5582)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42990) - you deserved it (6133)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my neighbor threatened to call the cops if I didn't turn the volume down on my porno. I was only watching women's tennis. FML

#21157299
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41441) - you deserved it (4757)

On 05/30/2014 at 4:07pm - misc - by Mem (woman) - Sweden (Gavleborgs Lan)

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63773) - you deserved it (8102)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48670) - you deserved it (4422)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45987) - you deserved it (5953)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52076) - you deserved it (4707)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)



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