About Zombielanddd : I've been here forever, just never had an account.
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Zombielanddd's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
by hannaaaahr / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health
by maruskasommers / 01/09/2012 at 4:39am / Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj) / Miscellaneous
by caught / 01/08/2012 at 7:43pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by omgwhyme / 01/08/2012 at 9:36am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 01/08/2012 at 7:24am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by Kyle / 01/05/2012 at 1:58am / United States / Miscellaneous
by nickthetank / 12/31/2011 at 4:21am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
by KrissyBearr / 12/30/2011 at 8:36pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I was taking people's orders at the drive-thru. I was confused as to why people were screaming their orders at me, until one of my managers handed me a paper that he'd found taped to the menu, saying "speak loudly speaker isn't working properly." Punkd. FML
by Ashton Sprunger / 12/30/2011 at 12:38am / United States / Work
by Kevin / 12/29/2011 at 2:32pm / France / Miscellaneous
by Girl-of-very-little-brain / 12/29/2011 at 7:01am / Canada / Health
by ericane27 / 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/25/2011 at 11:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/25/2011 at 7:07pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Intimacy
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm / Australia / Health
- Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in… Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like… Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float.…
- Today, while discussing with my boyfriend Brangelinas break up I said Brad probably cheated again… Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided… Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me he's unhappy with his life. He's basically with me because I…