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Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3240) - you totally deserved it (10816)
On 02/28/2010 at 4:12am - misc - by combo - Sent from a mobile version
Today, it snowed in South Carolina for the first time in 10 years. It snowed eight whole inches! I was so excited, I yelled for my kids and ran outside to build a snowman. I ran out to the steps and slipped on ice. I woke up in the hospital with a bad concussion. The snow had all melted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15739) - you totally deserved it (2589)
On 02/13/2010 at 3:11pm - kids - by owwie - United States
Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21110) - you totally deserved it (1648)
On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - misc - by Dog fart - United States
Today, I was in class and noticed that it smelled strongly of cat urine. I smelled my shoulder and realized that my cat had peed on my sweater. I had six hours of classes left, and the smell had permeated my shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11314) - you totally deserved it (3034)
On 02/10/2010 at 4:19pm - misc - by snickerdoodles (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4151) - you totally deserved it (1822)
On 02/10/2010 at 10:08am - intimacy - by ryan - United States
Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20636) - you totally deserved it (2316)
On 02/09/2010 at 1:20pm - kids - by justme - Sent from a mobile version
Today, my boyfriend of six months dumped me for his girlfriend on Grand Theft Auto because he was "tired of having to please two women at once." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16756) - you totally deserved it (1881)
On 02/08/2010 at 9:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I found out that the necklace my boyfriend gave me for my birthday was actually a gift he'd given to his ex girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15131) - you totally deserved it (1293)
On 02/08/2010 at 3:24pm - love - by Chrissy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while on my way to the break room, it seemed as if everyone was staring at me and giving me odd looks. I asked my friend, "Did I get prettier overnight or something?" She answered, "No, your shirt is just see-through." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4718) - you totally deserved it (13758)
On 02/08/2010 at 1:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, there was a new and extremely attractive girl at youth group, so I decided to introduce myself. Her reply was, "Wow, I've always wanted to meet a gay guy!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18379) - you totally deserved it (2189)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:39pm - love - by Richard - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happens to be my 18 year old sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you totally deserved it (2220)
On 02/05/2010 at 4:18pm - love - by whoknows?! - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15906) - you totally deserved it (2699)
On 02/05/2010 at 10:14am - misc - by fububc - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I couldn't use my normal subway exit stairway. There was a homeless man blocking the exit, furiously shitting and wiping his ass with newspaper. I can never un-see this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23392) - you totally deserved it (1222)
On 02/04/2010 at 1:01am - misc - by subwayrider (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I realized my girlfriend has more hair on her abdomen than I have on mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15098) - you totally deserved it (3432)
On 02/03/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by cogu - Sent from a mobile version
Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you totally deserved it (1311)
On 02/03/2010 at 12:58pm - love - by bluebride (woman) - United States (Illinois)
