Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ZaroraQuinsey

Offline (yesterday at 8:40pm) | Search for a member

ZaroraQuinsey

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 13 October 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 879
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ZaroraQuinsey : oh well

ZaroraQuinsey's page activity

Visits<b>DeathcoreDoge</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:33pm<b>domolovesyoshi</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 10:37am<b>Maiko_rayquaza</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:19pm<b>Miizuo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:30pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 11:59am<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 7:55am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 6:02pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:28pm

ZaroraQuinsey's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of ZaroraQuinsey's badges

ZaroraQuinsey's favorite FMLs

Today, trying to be a good role model for the kids behind me, I stopped and thoroughly checked both sides of the road before crossing. I still managed to get hit by a car. FML

#21287500
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27166) - you deserved it (5155)

On 10/29/2014 at 4:19am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML

#21279866
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37459) - you deserved it (5427)

On 10/17/2014 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by gettinghotinhere - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street holding my boyfriend's hand, when a seemingly sweet old man said to him, "Hey, you've got to hold her hand properly". I asked him to show me what properly meant. He licked my hand. FML

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42248) - you deserved it (5126)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got hit by a car while riding my bike to work. In the hospital, every single nurse lectured me about how I wouldn't be here if I wore a helmet, which I'm sure would be really helpful to my broken leg. FML

#21262936
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37534) - you deserved it (4560)

On 09/22/2014 at 2:45am - health - by thebrokentardis (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I landed my first job as a security officer. Only after I signed all the paperwork did I find out that the area I'll be working is apparently a hotspot for violent shootings. I'm screwed. FML

#21244497
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36590) - you deserved it (5334)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:03pm - work - by fucked - United States (California)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37575) - you deserved it (6748)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22075) - you deserved it (36163)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33523) - you deserved it (11236)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35137) - you deserved it (11498)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to grip the headboard of my bed for the first time in months. I wasn't having incredible sex unfortunately, just really bad gas. FML

#21203235
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40650) - you deserved it (5236)

On 07/08/2014 at 7:37pm - intimacy - by HeartToFart - United States (Florida)

Today, I helped my dad push our broken-down truck from the driveway onto the tire ramp. Truck didn't make it; neither did my leg. FML

#21202583
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40299) - you deserved it (3803)

On 07/08/2014 at 4:40am - misc - by crippled (man) - United States (Nevada)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: