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Xythenol

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Xythenol

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3283
  • Number of comments : 189
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Xythenol : What to say, what to say...
Welp. I'm 17 years old and I love a good joke. Hence, why I come here. If it's not for the FML, then it's the comment section.
Peeps call me Geli. You...probably won't call me anything but the number I happen to be.

Dunno why you clicked my profile, but, uh...hi :)

Xythenol's page activity

Visits<b>battlehamster</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 2:08am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 1:02am<b>LynxieLynx</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 11:54pm<b>theoneandonlybro</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 10:12pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:34pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 3:53pm<b>nelliegw</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 5:01pm<b>ApexReaper</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 6:03am<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 12:04pm<b>Chris93Jones</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 8:36am<b>Mornai</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 9:08am<b>_sunshine97</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 3:01am<b>hiimolivia</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 11:40pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 3:07pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 9:24pm<b>freakoutloudly</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 6:16pm<b>superrocket19</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 2:58pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 08/06/2012 at 10:03pm

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Xythenol's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you deserved it (4007)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40856) - you deserved it (3871)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25994) - you deserved it (8213)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23908) - you deserved it (2693)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17184) - you deserved it (29507)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, while waiting for my grandmother at the train station, a girl walked out and climbed into my car. When I cleared my throat to tell her of her mistake, she screamed and ran out as if I was a criminal trying to abduct her. FML

#19162083
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25906) - you deserved it (1988)

On 02/25/2012 at 4:38pm - misc - by eldar90 (man) - Israel

Today, my dad was complaining about how he makes so little money, so I suggested he invent something. The first thing that came to his mind was an automatic animal masturbator. FML

#19135287
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24981) - you deserved it (3210)

On 02/21/2012 at 10:43pm - intimacy - by nothowtheydoitinalabama - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to tell my wife that the new "vegan" diet she has put us on is not working with my body. It's not the horrible gas, hot shits, or constant hunger that made me realize this. It was the dream I had about fried chicken that did. FML

#19134075
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22977) - you deserved it (2811)

On 02/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by kohler9790 - United States

Today, while driving, I slowed down and made sure I safely went by a pedestrian, and in the process rear-ended the car in front of me. FML

#19133346
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7599) - you deserved it (18290)

On 02/21/2012 at 6:56pm - misc - by me (man) - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

#16081373
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37242) - you deserved it (11916)

On 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm - misc - by Mel (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14852) - you deserved it (44665)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49248) - you deserved it (5787)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

#15793137
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17554) - you deserved it (27902)

On 04/15/2011 at 7:47am - animals - by spiderwoman (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my 15 year old daughter got kicked out of her cheerleading squad because she was overweight. I heard one of the cheerleaders say, "She must be overweight because her mom is." FML

#15792635
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37391) - you deserved it (12359)

On 04/15/2011 at 5:30am - misc - by fatty:( - Australia

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

#15791793
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30064) - you deserved it (7142)

On 04/15/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by HWS - Canada (British Columbia)



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