Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Xcherrypie

Search for a member

Xcherrypie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1648
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Xcherrypie's page activity

Visits<b>poppypoptarts</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:49am<b>marleybree</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:42am<b>jesse91</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 7:58am<b>tshurtz722</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 10:54am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 10:07am<b>OhSnapItsSkyla</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 11:38pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 5:54am<b>Tempted1</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 3:00am<b>hellryu</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 9:02am<b>spiers1</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 2:24am<b>DarkSideOfBlack</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 5:05am<b>Simbaby</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 10:40pm<b>SadMansSandwich</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 7:45pm<b>armorman86</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 11:12am<b>PresAgent</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:25pm<b>Maddy_Moore</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm<b>JFloUnknown</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 4:29pm<b>seblikescricket</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 1:38am

Xcherrypie's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Xcherrypie's badges

Xcherrypie's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30928) - you deserved it (2611)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML

#19674357
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15090) - you deserved it (1726)

On 05/24/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by Notasinner (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

#19663287
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34294) - you deserved it (4021)

On 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while in the bathroom, I started absent-mindedly drumming on my thighs. I didn't stop to think that people outside would think I was masturbating. FML

#19655658
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21333) - you deserved it (6867)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by morethanredhands -

Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML

#19648090
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27396) - you deserved it (2406)

On 05/19/2012 at 6:54pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25186) - you deserved it (1934)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML

#19637447
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13940) - you deserved it (24791)

On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19337) - you deserved it (2470)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37920) - you deserved it (3969) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

#19618137
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8154) - you deserved it (30631)

On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46179) - you deserved it (8851)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States

Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML

#19555770
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25262) - you deserved it (3701)

On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML

#19531341
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24387) - you deserved it (2441)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

#19526031
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21797) - you deserved it (2680)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw a picture of a dude on a Harley on my friend's wall. I asked her if it was Dog the bounty hunter. It wasn't, it was her aunt. FML



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: