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WishfullThinker

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WishfullThinker
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2586
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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WishfullThinker's last visitors

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WishfullThinker's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of WishfullThinker's badges

WishfullThinker's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38583) - you deserved it (3351)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44390) - you deserved it (6056)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML

#21079127
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35801) - you deserved it (14225)

On 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

#21074688
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38314) - you deserved it (8502)

On 03/01/2014 at 3:23am - animals - by lacy - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML

#21062639
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17592) - you deserved it (41829)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:44pm - kids - by lyss - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

#21061154
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49056) - you deserved it (4610)

On 02/15/2014 at 2:11am - work - by chinaski7628 - United States (California)

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43263) - you deserved it (2986)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44401) - you deserved it (8167)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML

#21012251
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42237) - you deserved it (4394)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:04am - love - by dantko (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML

#21004456
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34490) - you deserved it (7589)

On 12/25/2013 at 1:38am - work - by peevedemployee - United States

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35432) - you deserved it (9973)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40598) - you deserved it (9142)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44827) - you deserved it (2778)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54516) - you deserved it (8925)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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