WeezyBites

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WeezyBites

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1608
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About WeezyBites : Oh, hello there.

WeezyBites's page activity

Visits<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 12:00am<b>MethuselahTurtle</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 7:28am<b>helloimkylieee</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 11:24pm<b>zAstonish</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:07am<b>theinfiniteend</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 3:00pm<b>papygeorges</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 6:12pm<b>naaddzz</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 12:30am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 7:20am<b>cupcakekate9</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 6:56pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:40pm<b>papashaan</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 3:09pm<b>EnJey0</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 6:06pm<b>sevazilla</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 3:27pm<b>agustibaarn</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 10:49am<b>abbythemuffin</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:09pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 8:38am<b>AE101</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 5:47pm<b>Anthonymm2</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 4:42am

Fucked!<b>papygeorges</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 12:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:20pm<b>sevazilla</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 9:27pm

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WeezyBites's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

by foshizzle / 04/25/2012 at 2:46am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, on my way to my therapist, my father told me to lie to her and tell her that I'm happy so he doesn't have to drive me in anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2012 at 12:50am / Canada / Health

Today, my doctor booked me in for an STD test. I was feeling confident until he explained it will involve having a catheter inserted into my piss pipe. He shook his head sadly and said: "Gonna be honest, Steve, the pain's beyond belief." Great. FML

by 0stvn0 / 03/15/2012 at 9:18pm / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Intimacy

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

by Fraser / 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a picture of my creepy uncle and me on Facebook, which he had captioned "me and my woman," and posted several lewd comments on. I guess he forgot I'm his friend on Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2012 at 4:19pm / Virgin Islands British / Miscellaneous

Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML

by dadadoo / 02/05/2012 at 11:09pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML

by idrathernotgiveoutmyname / 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

by ugh / 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I grabbed some lotion to have a good old wank. However, I'd got it a bit wrong in my rush to spurt my man-mush into an old gym sock, and had picked up some concentrated bronzer. I now have neon-orange hands and genitals. FML

by Colton / 12/19/2011 at 9:29pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, in science class, we had to make play-dough with our lab partners. We were allowed to put one thing in it to make it more bouncy or rubbery. My partner said that he wanted to put a chicken wing in ours. FML

by Anonymous / 11/28/2011 at 10:45am / United States / Geek

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

by religionbites621 / 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work