About WaywardDaughter : Anything you say here can and will be used against you.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
42
You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.
Today, I continued my habit of saying, "It smells like lung cancer over here" any time I see a smoker. This guy turned out to be an amateur MMA fighter, and I was his "workout" for the day. I guess his lungs are doing fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7419) - you deserved it (36549)
On 07/25/2012 at 12:10am - health - by xd3box - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4628) - you deserved it (26180) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4722) - you deserved it (33200)
On 06/26/2012 at 1:44am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a kid got his hand stuck inside my store's giant gumball machine. He started crying, and his negligent train-wreck of a mom bitched me out for being "unobservant." I'd been mopping up the mess she'd made after she spilled an open can of beer all over the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (903)
On 06/24/2012 at 2:41pm - work - by hannaslifesucks (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend told me that she's a different person without coffee and smokes in the morning, she wasn't kidding; after I'd asked her how she'd slept, she bitched me out for "mocking her" and hurled a hairdryer at my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16230) - you deserved it (2485)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:57am - love - by crazybitch - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not by any sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13970) - you deserved it (3269)
On 04/27/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Bullocks (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I discovered that my daughter refuses to eat, but not because she's anorexic. Apparently, her health class has learned about the digestive system and now she refuses to "take part in something so gross." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18006) - you deserved it (1539)
On 04/26/2012 at 12:36am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I've now received my 73rd email in two days about my masters group project on policy recommendations for security reform. One group member has helpfully rewritten everything, and our project is now titled "Zeus's Earthly Kingdom." It's due today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12181) - you deserved it (1589)
On 04/25/2012 at 9:25am - work - by IHateGroupProjects (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13442) - you deserved it (6814)
On 04/25/2012 at 12:50am - misc - by unfortunate (woman) - Sweden
Today, my parents went out of town and I was home all alone. I put up party decorations such as streamers, balloons and confetti. Then, I drank out of red cups, crushed them up and put them all over the house. I didn't have a party, I just wanted to convince my family that I'm not a loser. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18154) - you deserved it (12539)
On 04/24/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by Jaclk - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my husband announced that he wants to separate emotionally. Meanwhile, he still wants me to cook and clean for him while he dates his new girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31276) - you deserved it (2035)
On 04/24/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by anonymous - United States
Today, I paid for someone else's pee so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6343) - you deserved it (44991)
On 04/24/2012 at 4:29am - work - by xharmonyx - United States
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20716) - you deserved it (7959)
On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17702) - you deserved it (2616)
On 04/21/2012 at 9:04am - love - by still hungry - United States (Illinois)
Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17787) - you deserved it (3480)
On 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm - kids - by James (man) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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