About WaywardDaughter : Anything you say here can and will be used against you.Live long and prosper!
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WaywardDaughter's favorite FMLs
by lex / 02/14/2013 at 6:01am / United States / Love
by Roxy19 / 01/22/2013 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML
by Latina / 01/11/2013 at 5:24am / United States (Arizona) / Love
Today, I woke up to a small fire on my roof, burning up small twigs and branches. The cause? Last night, I threw a sparkling firecracker up very high, only to have it blown onto my roof by the wind. It's going to take $2,000 to fix the damage. FML
by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 1:23pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML
by Anonymous / 12/02/2012 at 3:19am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by me. / 12/01/2012 at 9:54am / United States / Intimacy
by Chuffy / 12/01/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML
by onlyslightly / 11/30/2012 at 3:33am / United States / Work
Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML
by ekm86 / 11/26/2012 at 11:52am / United States (Oregon) / Kids
by babyblues / 11/20/2012 at 2:45pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 6:28am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by wdunn69733 / 10/11/2012 at 10:30am / United States (Georgia) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 12:40pm / United States (Ohio) / Work
Today, I received the heels I'll be wearing at my best friend's wedding. The bride ordered them for us to match the dresses. They're six-inch platform heels. I have three broken toes and am still wearing a boot. The wedding is next weekend. FML
by AnnieThrax / 09/18/2012 at 12:35am / United States (Minnesota) / Health
by Mrs. Teacher / 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Work
- Today, I discovered that my husband is a tad paranoid after finding out that our cat has worms. He… Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed… Today, it's my birthday. I was excited because of all the wall posts I got on Facebook. Then I saw…