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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Wargen

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Wargen
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 439
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Wargen's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML

#17142025 (200)

I agree, your life sucks (23524) - you deserved it (1967)

On 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm - work - by sandwichmaker - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant, where the chefs cook the food right in front of you. Our chef tossed an egg in the air, but sadly didn't catch it. Don't worry though, my hair got it instead. FML

#17136219 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (2121)

On 07/16/2011 at 1:24pm - misc - by KatrinaKitten - United States (New York)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448 (318)

I agree, your life sucks (30974) - you deserved it (2905)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085 (323)

I agree, your life sucks (26195) - you deserved it (5936)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

#17123749 (261)

I agree, your life sucks (31032) - you deserved it (5114)

On 07/15/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, after 14 rice-filled days in China, I came back home. What's for lunch? Rice. FML

#17120359 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (20124) - you deserved it (6497)

On 07/15/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by panos016 - United Kingdom

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937 (225)

I agree, your life sucks (1440) - you deserved it (1564)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML

#16057186 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (8328) - you deserved it (5094)

On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I discovered that my new boyfriend is the type of guy who, when there is a conflict, will just scream "I LOVE YOU" over and over hoping that it will solve itself instead of actually trying to work the problem out. FML

#16055177 (231)

I agree, your life sucks (28687) - you deserved it (5464)

On 05/05/2011 at 10:40am - love - by sad (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I brought my girlfriend of four months home for dinner to meet my parents. The first thing my mom says to her? "Oh my God, you're real!" FML

#16051471 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (28195) - you deserved it (3242)

On 05/04/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Charlie (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad hid the toilet paper and is charging me 50 cents a roll. FML

#16038977 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (24206) - you deserved it (3826)

On 05/03/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by wiper -

Today, I finished working a 70 hour work week. I'm a lineman for the electric company, and worked extended hours all week getting people's lights back on after a wind storm. When I got home, my power was out. FML

#16032358 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (30567) - you deserved it (1966)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:58pm - work - by LightsOut - United States

Today, my grandma moved in with us. Along with her 36-year old boyfriend that none of us knew about. FML

#16031811 (182)

I agree, your life sucks (15054) - you deserved it (1158)

On 05/03/2011 at 12:32pm - love - by moetplease - Singapore

Today, my motorcycle was stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, the thief drove past me. Twice. FML

#16030983 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (30637) - you deserved it (2970)

On 05/03/2011 at 10:23am - misc - by Diesel (man) - Belgium (Luxembourg)

Today, I realized that the cashier at the liquor store and I are already on a first-name basis. I just moved to this town a week ago. FML

#16014326 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (8517) - you deserved it (21021)

On 05/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by alchy (woman) - United States