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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, as a physics teacher, I was testing a class to see how high a sound frequency they could hear. One girl claimed she could hear the sound even though it was physically impossible. Without thinking, I replied "Only dogs can hear this frequency." Needless to say, she was picked on all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20866) - you deserved it (9066)
On 10/29/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by mrtut (man) - United Kingdom (Merseyside)
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20158) - you deserved it (32665)
On 08/05/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by JDLAX1924 - United States
Today, I wrapped a towel around my waist so I could take a dump while using my laptop. I sat on the toilet seat and let a big load go. Turns out I forgot to unwrap the towel. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6100) - you deserved it (48248)
On 04/16/2010 at 8:34am - health - by TowelSmellsNice (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)
Today, my mom is going with me for a general check-up at the doctor's office. She just told me she had a nightmare last night that she went to the doctor with me, and he told her I'm pregnant. I am pregnant. I was about to tell her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (6150)
On 02/03/2010 at 8:18pm - health - by XxOx - Sent from mobile version
Today, at my school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 for Haiti. They are doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31806) - you deserved it (3031)
On 01/27/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by evil - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13084) - you deserved it (30693)
On 01/24/2010 at 10:31pm - misc - by Ben (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18189) - you deserved it (2550)
On 01/14/2010 at 4:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out that when an officer screams, "DON'T MOVE OR I'LL TASE YOU". It really means, "If you so much as flinch I'm going to shoot and 50,000 volts will be directed through your nose and groin." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18576) - you deserved it (8169)
On 12/16/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, and to whom I intended to propose on Thanksgiving, dumped me because her husband will be returning from Iraq soon. And he wants to have a "talk" with me. I didn't know she was married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30566) - you deserved it (2455)
On 11/25/2009 at 8:56am - love - by blasted (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I went to see the cast list for the new musical I'm in. I didn't get the part I wanted, and instead I got the part of one of the suitors. Interestingly, they made me the suitor to my ex. And the guy she leaves me for at the end of the musical is the guy she left me for in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33233) - you deserved it (1914)
On 11/14/2009 at 7:59am - love - by Indoraptor (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out my mom is the nude model for an art class at my college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44907) - you deserved it (2045)
On 10/22/2009 at 8:30am - misc - by scarred - Sent from mobile version
Today, I decided to check out my school's quarterback's Twitter, since we have a class together. He wrote, "Dear girl in front of me, I thought you were pretty until you turned around." It was funny, until I realized the timestamp was when we have class together, and I sit in front of him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30186) - you deserved it (549)
On 09/11/2009 at 1:05pm - misc - by thatgirl247 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (137066) - you deserved it (10984)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, it's my birthday and I received a signed vintage Beatles' album from my wife. Awesome right? It's the same album some jerk way over-bidded me for on eBay. That jerk was my wife, using my credit card. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48088) - you deserved it (6256)
On 06/26/2009 at 5:51am - money - by xero_art (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
I agree, your life sucks (113486) - you deserved it (6694)
On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 20 May 2013
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