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Wafflestomper

Offline (the 01/31/2016 at 12:42am) | Search for a member

Wafflestomper

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2978
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Wafflestomper : Throw the CHEEEEEEEESE

Wafflestomper's page activity

Visits<b>never_alone</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 10:19am<b>Turtle_Man</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:31am<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:13am<b>RoboCunnilingus</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 11:18pm<b>smiliecat</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 7:36pm<b>Zkows20</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 10:42pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2013 at 5:45am<b>TheEmoSuperman</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 7:21am<b>LaLince</b> - the 12/15/2012 at 3:07pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 11/02/2012 at 4:22pm<b>sillyyanks</b> - the 10/24/2012 at 6:34pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 09/28/2012 at 6:06pm<b>xalba</b> - the 08/29/2012 at 8:32pm<b>I_Hug_Cats</b> - the 04/09/2012 at 10:04pm<b>inlove72</b> - the 04/03/2012 at 11:02pm

Wafflestomper's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of Wafflestomper's badges

Wafflestomper's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32616) - you deserved it (7976)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32677) - you deserved it (6407)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my bra clasp broke in the middle of a job interview. I got the job on the spot. I'm scared to report into work. FML

#20407793
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33624) - you deserved it (4105)

On 12/19/2012 at 5:06pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

#20400604
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30281) - you deserved it (2330)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28620) - you deserved it (7793)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ran into my boss outside of work. She smiled, and started trying to have an in-depth chat with me. I wouldn't have minded, if it weren't for the fact I ran into her at a club, whilst they were having an S and M theme night. And we were both fully dressed up for it. FML

#20172556
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22891) - you deserved it (4419)

On 11/21/2012 at 3:43pm - work - by jobsearching (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML

#20165046
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24525) - you deserved it (3166)

On 11/16/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by grocerystalker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52140) - you deserved it (6512)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about extinct peoples, and I said how close the Jewish people came to becoming one. She condescendingly told me they don't exist anymore. When I asked what she was talking about, I realized she was confusing them with the Vikings. What the hell? FML

#20126556
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24480) - you deserved it (3014)

On 10/21/2012 at 12:00pm - misc - by tempted to become single (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26802) - you deserved it (4684)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML

#20091945
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36147) - you deserved it (2679)

On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML

#20081762
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25367) - you deserved it (13581)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64992) - you deserved it (3511)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend cutely climbed through my bedroom window for some sexy time. He decided he'd introduce bondage. As I was tied to the bed, completely naked, we heard the front door open. He got scared and left via the window, leaving me handcuffed to my bed. FML

Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML

#19993820
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29394) - you deserved it (4716)

On 07/31/2012 at 1:36am - kids - by mcase - United States (California)



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