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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2728
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Wafflestomper : Throw the CHEEEEEEEESE

Wafflestomper's page activity

Visits<b>never_alone</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 10:19am<b>Turtle_Man</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:31am<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:13am<b>RoboCunnilingus</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 11:18pm<b>smiliecat</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 7:36pm<b>Zkows20</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 10:42pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/29/2013 at 5:45am<b>TheEmoSuperman</b> - the 12/30/2012 at 7:21am<b>LaLince</b> - the 12/15/2012 at 3:07pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 11/02/2012 at 4:22pm<b>sillyyanks</b> - the 10/24/2012 at 6:34pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 09/28/2012 at 6:06pm<b>xalba</b> - the 08/29/2012 at 8:32pm<b>I_Hug_Cats</b> - the 04/09/2012 at 10:04pm<b>inlove72</b> - the 04/03/2012 at 11:02pm

Wafflestomper's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Wafflestomper's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML


Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28750) - you deserved it (48149)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, my husband's recent obsession with The Sopranos since James Gandolfini died went a step further into the ridiculous, when he tried to encourage some ducks to land in our swimming pool by throwing loaves of bread into it, while bellowing at them with a 'Noo Joisey' Wise Guy accent. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33976) - you deserved it (3342)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:57am - misc - by Not Mrs Soprano (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44217) - you deserved it (20981)

On 06/18/2013 at 7:27pm - animals - by CatLover<3 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was told by my grandfather that I was no longer allowed to visit him or to set foot in his house. Why? He found out I have been taking Japanese and German as electives in my degree, so I must be an 'enemy spy'. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49446) - you deserved it (5022)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:09am - work - by Frazz (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31597) - you deserved it (56326)

On 05/28/2013 at 8:48pm - money - by pool party - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my father if he was proud that I have never done drugs, never drank alcohol, never had sex, never had psychological problems, never been to the hospital for something serious, never been in a fight and maintain good grades. He told me I was a boring daughter. FML


I agree, your life sucks (54351) - you deserved it (19222)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by peallow (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML


I agree, your life sucks (53020) - you deserved it (7450)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, for the third time this week, a telemarketer called me. Seriously annoyed, I told him in German that I don't speak English, in an attempt to get rid of him. He then started delivering his product pitch in German. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53295) - you deserved it (11987)

On 04/28/2013 at 9:57am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with my sister, due to involuntary muscle spasms she was having. They gave her a muscle relaxer which caused her to be extremely tired and loopy. She decided to start singing loudly with a song she made up about butt fucking. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52353) - you deserved it (4921)

On 04/27/2013 at 8:42am - health - by seekerglow176 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML


I agree, your life sucks (84910) - you deserved it (4471)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (61510) - you deserved it (8181)

On 04/22/2013 at 4:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (72871) - you deserved it (18918)

On 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by Gurior - Canada

Today, it transpired that my mom has been spending her stint in prison trying to play matchmaker for me, going so far as to call one of her finds, "good breeding stock". Apparently, I don't already have enough criminals in my life; last September I was the only member of my family of 5 not locked up. FML

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