About Vo13c3s1nMyH3ad : Hello potential stalker (I hope you are because that'd be flattering) I'm a Marine, I enjoy scuba diving, rock climbing, long walks on the beach (haha), working out, and talking. I love talking to strangers because they're the most interesting!, so message me! :)
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23866) - you deserved it (2632)
On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was holding our weekly poker game with a few work buddies. My psychotic, live-in mother-in-law wasted no time jumping into the game, cheating me out of $150, my new wristwatch, and what little pride I had left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11306) - you deserved it (6772)
On 03/30/2012 at 7:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was opening a present my boyfriend got me for my 21st birthday. What I unwrapped was a Kay jewelers box. Excited, I opened it to find a ring made out of a one dollar bill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20355) - you deserved it (3282)
On 03/11/2012 at 7:33am - love - by AkGirl1991 - United States (Alaska)
Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31464) - you deserved it (5826)
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45237) - you deserved it (14534)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37715) - you deserved it (3809)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16160) - you deserved it (32434)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)
Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22903) - you deserved it (30648)
On 07/31/2011 at 5:45pm - love - by iannie - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30840) - you deserved it (4461)
On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)
Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27959) - you deserved it (5811)
On 06/06/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by dwhite032 - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13787) - you deserved it (30825)
On 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm - misc - by - United States
Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31510) - you deserved it (2856)
On 05/27/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56462) - you deserved it (3357)
On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28354) - you deserved it (13125)
On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36014) - you deserved it (5953)
On 05/04/2011 at 7:51am - intimacy - by woah (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
