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VivaLaColdplay

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VivaLaColdplay

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 May 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 23430
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About VivaLaColdplay : Elloh! :D

VivaLaColdplay's page activity

Visits<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - one hour ago<b>Murilirum</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:55pm<b>prettyinpinkxoxo</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 1:15am<b>hotel135</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 12:40am<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 5:44pm<b>AwkwardShoe</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:20pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 11:47am<b>briang959</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 9:22am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 6:34pm<b>Cynical_D_Luffy</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:09pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 11:10pm<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:31am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 2:57am<b>arrow007archer</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:57pm<b>swiftous</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:22pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:49pm<b>DarkCaesar</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 12:00am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 6:08pm

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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VivaLaColdplay's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48471) - you deserved it (8857)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40941) - you deserved it (25781)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35079) - you deserved it (3322)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48877) - you deserved it (4183)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40158) - you deserved it (7204)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

#21214404
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50483) - you deserved it (6790)

On 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by Death By Parent (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47743) - you deserved it (6802)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, every house in my neighborhood was vandalized. They skipped our house. Everybody thinks it was me. FML

#21209396
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51938) - you deserved it (3885)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:35pm - misc - by chloecamp - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44307) - you deserved it (8286)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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