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Today, there was a story called "Looking Good" about fashion in school that ran in the local newspaper. On the front page of that section it featured a picture of my class. I was photoshopped out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56865) - you deserved it (3567)
On 03/05/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by failout (man) - United States (California)
Today, I received a card in the mail. It was from my vet's office. Written inside was "We send our sympathy during this trying time." I haven't been home in three days. I can't find my dog and my mother won't talk about it. My dog was 7. She hated that dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56245) - you deserved it (1595)
On 03/05/2009 at 11:06am - animals - by nochance (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I took my girlfriend to a very nice restaurant. I thought it would be a good place to pop the question. I gave the ring to the waiter and asked him to put it on her dessert plate. When she saw it she picked it up, put it down and said "no". Then she started to eat the dessert. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70636) - you deserved it (3716)
On 03/04/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Florida)
Today, I woke up at 5:30 AM to my boyfriend flipping on the lights and shouting, "We have a problem!" Our chinchilla had gotten out of his maximum security cage, and half of our apartment is now underwater because he decided the water line that leads to the fridge would make a tasty midnight snack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43870) - you deserved it (7190)
On 03/04/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by Sara (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I got my eyebrows waxed for the first time in a few months. Once she finished, she handed me the mirror and asked, "How does it feel to look human again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (38289) - you deserved it (9540)
On 03/03/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by bluedevil26 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6127) - you deserved it (72268)
On 03/03/2009 at 11:49am - misc - by noway6000 - United States (Virginia)
Today, at work, our new cute intern asked me if I could explain my work. Taking a cool posture sitting on her desk I explained. After 10 minutes I walked away, only to hear her laughing with the girl next to her. Turns out my fly was open. And I didn't wear underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11243) - you deserved it (56872)
On 03/03/2009 at 9:55am - work - by Peter80 (man) - Netherlands (Limburg)
Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarreah in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping form and he rolled over to whisper, "I heard everthing." FML
I agree, your life sucks (63515) - you deserved it (13060)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:51pm - love - by ohmygoodness (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids." I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32917) - you deserved it (382815)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by PicturePerfect (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and says "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50678) - you deserved it (8818)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:26pm - love - by ak (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of no where and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says "I always knew you were a whore." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54449) - you deserved it (12868)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by Stairway2Heaven - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was questioned about a request for a restraining order filed against me by an old woman. According to the report, she's seen me "walking near her house and waving at her" for the last two months. I've been her next-door neighbor for a year and a half. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50597) - you deserved it (1591)
On 03/01/2009 at 1:37pm - misc - by Friendly (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55293) - you deserved it (215647)
On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out I could not go to the Philippines because I have never had Chicken Pox. The school took the radical decision to prohibit students who have never had Chicken Pox to leave the college. I am condemned to stay in Hong Kong in some shitty project because I am a healthy young man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51259) - you deserved it (3087)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:14am - health - by Swaby (man) - Hong Kong
Today, I got a 31% on a Chinese test at school. I moved here to New Jersey from China two months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49475) - you deserved it (15776)
On 02/28/2009 at 3:57pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 20 May 2013
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