VeganVampyre

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Offline (the 05/02/2016 at 4:31am)

VeganVampyre

110Fucked!

VeganVampyre
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5620
  • Number of comments : 1121
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About VeganVampyre : No, I'm not actually vegan. I am a vampire though ;)
The name is because of an amazing novel called "Suck It Up". Read it. Now. The pic is me at Hallowe'en dressed as a vampire. The second pic is the stray kitty I recently took in and who my FML is about. I hope that's why you're here because I can't imagine why else you would be.
I don't care if this is the Internet, learn proper English! The Grammar Nazis WILL come for you! Of course, I am an English major so maybe I care more than most :P
I love reading, music, volleyball, snowboarding, and rock climbing. And sarcasm. Feel free to message me now that the app has that ability! :)

"I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request." That is all. Have a nice day =)

VeganVampyre's page activity

Visits<b>AlucardIT90</b> - 4 hours ago<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:49am<b>Rea516</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 10:54am<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 11:41pm<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 10:24pm<b>h3llsbells</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:25pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 3:36pm<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 1:34pm<b>trevieh47</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 8:11pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:00pm<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 4:19am<b>yenze</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 8:57pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 9:14pm<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 10:42pm<b>simmy01191</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 3:09pm<b>Wane8822</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 6:24am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 9:13am<b>Mons</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 5:46am

Fucked!<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 4:25am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:16pm<b>nicolai44</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:46am<b>PlsNarwals</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 6:05am<b>csjc</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:12pm<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 11:21am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:52am<b>Arni792</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:21am<b>A07</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 5:12am<b>zwright</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 7:10pm<b>laughingboy23</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:21pm<b>MasterTron</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 8:17pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 5:30pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 3:58pm<b>ilpazzo</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 6:54pm<b>NateC27</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 6:32pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 4:28pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 3:21am

VeganVampyre's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Follow up

You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

See all of VeganVampyre's badges

VeganVampyre's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was such a coward that instead of breaking up with me, he changed his phone number. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2012 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

by jenni6488 / 02/22/2012 at 2:56am / United Kingdom (Gateshead) / Miscellaneous

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

by SocialAnxietyNightmare / 02/09/2012 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

by eakthegeek / 01/10/2012 at 4:36am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML

by hannahlorraine / 11/24/2011 at 10:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

by lprocter1982 / 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML

by benji / 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I drove past a fragrant steakhouse and my mouth began to water and my stomach started rumbling, which would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan and an animal lover. My confused body craves burning flesh. FML

by loves the smell of burning flesh / 11/01/2011 at 9:22am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML

by candice / 11/01/2011 at 5:09am / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous