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Valdrek

Offline (the 10/17/2014 at 2:38am) | Search for a member

Valdrek

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3959
  • Number of comments : 125
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About Valdrek : I have been reading FML's since the app first came out four or so years ago now and still love and read them every single day.

I'm down to earth and I think I am level headed, it just depends on wether the person I'm speaking to is a knob head or not.

I love animals, all animals really...just not crawly little buggers. I HATE any kind of animal cruelty and feel strongly enough about it to kill to stop animal cruelty.

I believe in honor and duty.

KiK: DmitriK
Snapchat: jackusdanielsus

Valdrek's page activity

Visits<b>lulinator</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 2:59pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:46pm<b>nchic01</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:00pm<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:01am<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 9:54am<b>Wjanzen32</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 10:09pm<b>metalscales</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 11:08am<b>TanzWolf</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 10:11pm<b>cmayer</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:07am<b>ChloeMeyers</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:41am<b>Jumbabaginji</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 8:47am<b>PrimalWeapons</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:10am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 8:44am<b>billionair11</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 1:24pm<b>DaDezza244</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 4:07am<b>nikolina</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:42pm<b>imasexyburrito</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 12:01am<b>Nevracceptdefeat</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:38am

Valdrek's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of Valdrek's badges

Valdrek's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, my boyfriend got a new tattoo. It was a big tattoo of Pikachu on his hip. I told him now I'd feel like I was having sex with an 8-year-old boy. His defense? "No, no, think of it as having sex with Pikachu!" He still refuses to understand why that's weird. FML

#20050023
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24493) - you deserved it (4883)

On 08/30/2012 at 9:08pm - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, yet again, I was getting intimate with my shower head. Some complete genius decided to flush the toilet downstairs halfway through, which sent scalding-hot water all up in my privates. I've yet to find a comfortable sitting position. FML

#20046536
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16438) - you deserved it (38316)

On 08/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Bethany (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend came over to see me after almost a month of us not spending time together. Unfortunately, he came straight from bar-hopping with his friends and was wasted. He's currently naked in bed, cooing at his penis, and giggling like a little girl. FML

#20044244
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23333) - you deserved it (3015)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:57am - love - by kvdfan (woman) - United States

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27962) - you deserved it (3746)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to give my boyfriend an enema. FML

#20038693
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18254) - you deserved it (2429)

On 08/24/2012 at 1:21am - health - by coop7291 - United States

Today, my boyfriend confided to me that he has a used condom collection. When I reacted with disgust, he "reassured" me that he only keeps the ones he uses with me. FML

#20036074
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28465) - you deserved it (2503)

On 08/22/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by WTF (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my girlfriend decided that having OCD will help her lose weight. She is now convinced that walking in and out of doorways multiple times will burn fat. FML

#20033299
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19456) - you deserved it (1996)

On 08/21/2012 at 2:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I had to finally accept that my husband is too large for me. Normally, it'd be a bragging point, except my private parts can't handle it. After several infections brought on after vaginal tearing, I'm having to choose between being in perpetual pain, or giving up my sex life. FML

#20028986
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48087) - you deserved it (3420)

On 08/18/2012 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by sal (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my girlfriend started a huge fight with me over how I don't have the right to have close female friends anymore. She ended up storming off, and won't return my calls. But no worries: she did just play the word "murder" in our game of Words With Friends. Very comforting. FML

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

#20021274
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21315) - you deserved it (2430)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML

#20018436
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34876) - you deserved it (4812)

On 08/13/2012 at 8:19am - intimacy - by hmmmm (woman) - Australia

Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML

#20016279
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45762) - you deserved it (2993)

On 08/12/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by happybirthday - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14785) - you deserved it (38453)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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Friday 17 October 2014

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