Vaetrus

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Vaetrus

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2220
  • Number of comments : 231
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Vaetrus : I don't check comments twice. I barely check 'em the first time. If you are neurotic enough to want me to know your opinion of what I wrote, then write it down on a piece of paper and mail it to Santa. He knows how to get it to me. I will send a response back when I start believing in Santa.

Vaetrus's page activity

Visits<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 11:31pm<b>swaddison</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 11:50pm<b>Snip_Snap</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 4:46am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 1:25am<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 8:11am<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 9:52am<b>Hieroglyph</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 1:24am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Cupcakes4Jesus</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:52pm<b>Shoebur</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 5:18pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 2:22am<b>CreatingReality</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 3:52am<b>Scrambled</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 1:02pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 9:29pm<b>weston3473</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 10:57am<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 11:41pm<b>stephenseiber1</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 8:49pm<b>spiritwalker</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 12:32pm

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 1:56pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 2:11pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 3:53pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:22am

Vaetrus's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Vaetrus's favorite FMLs

Today, my date arrived far earlier than expected to pick me up. Apparently my mother decided to show him to my room anyway. When the door swung open, I happened to be butt naked in front of the mirror, trying to pick out an ingrown hair on my bum. FML

by stubblebutt / 11/13/2009 at 7:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that when you're the maid of honor giving a toast at your best friend's wedding, it's important to make sure the zipper on your dress is secured. Otherwise, your bare breasts and Hello Kitty panties could end up exposed to a wedding party of 600 people. FML

by meg265 / 10/24/2009 at 12:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML

by catgirl911 / 10/12/2009 at 9:44pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, my crush was talking to me on Facebook. He said, "Did you know that 99% of the time a guy is talking to a girl it's because he wants to go out with her? Yeah, well, this is that 1%." FML

by Icy / 10/01/2009 at 2:59am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

by grossgross / 09/26/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

by grossgross / 09/26/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me because I didn't fight some guy that started hitting her right in front of me... In a dream. She was totally serious. FML

by dreamdude / 09/20/2009 at 9:21am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend meeting all of his friends for the first time. My boyfriend went into the kitchen to get me a drink, and after ten minutes I went looking for him. I discovered his friend holding two melons to his chest, mid explanation on how they look exactly like mine. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2009 at 8:00am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a romantic date to the mountains to look a stars with a boy I had just met. We started kissing and he stopped, asking if it was rude for him to take me home now. After getting dropped off, he texted me saying we could never do that again and we should never talk about it. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2009 at 5:26pm / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML

by keepsmiling / 09/02/2009 at 7:19am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML

by pokie / 08/30/2009 at 1:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2009 at 12:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a prank call. I now wish he'd call back so I can actually talk to someone. FML

by MelanieP / 08/28/2009 at 11:39pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to initiate sex with my boyfriend. As I put on my most seductive moves, he ever so nicely says, "Babe, we just had sex last night. Why don't we wait a while so you've had some time to tighten back up." FML

by LizP40 / 08/27/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my mother was cleaning out my underwear drawer and found my vibrator. Everytime I see her in the hall, she just cracks up and makes jokes about how I can't get a guy, so I have to rely on electronics. What's worse, she told my dad AND posted a status on facebook about it. FML

by Sarah / 08/25/2009 at 12:04pm / United Kingdom / Love