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  • Number of visits : 2330
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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VHNox's page activity

Visits<b>Tripartita</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 7:32pm<b>McKinley19</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 9:39pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:05pm<b>lbanks</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 1:19am<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 9:33pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 11:46pm<b>sqeakyclean</b> - the 03/25/2012 at 11:44am<b>xxSatansAngelxx</b> - the 02/15/2012 at 2:05pm<b>Sebastian_NG</b> - the 12/30/2011 at 9:07pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 11/23/2011 at 8:40pm<b>THE_A_TEEN</b> - the 11/22/2011 at 11:46pm<b>brianjman14</b> - the 11/09/2011 at 8:52pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:18pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 07/23/2011 at 2:35pm<b>JipvS</b> - the 07/21/2011 at 5:41pm

VHNox's FML badges

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VHNox's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

by bubbalicious / 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 7:11am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

by joe1234 / 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, a fax came in at work for a specific job, and I asked the owner of the company who it was for. He replied "the round one", so I handed it to our rotund Project Manager. Apparently the owner meant the garbage can, not my fat co-worker. Now i'm the asshole of the office. FML

by kjcarey123 / 07/15/2009 at 1:24pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

by unicorn / 06/12/2009 at 12:49pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, when petting my friend's dog, I acted like I was going to make out with him. While I wasn't looking the dog stuck his entire tongue in my mouth. FML

by thedogkisser / 06/06/2009 at 3:44pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I was taking a bath and out of boredom started making sheep noises. I then had a conversation with myself in farm animal noises. When I got out of the bath, I walked to my bedroom in my towel, passing the living room... where my little brother's soccer team burst out laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 06/05/2009 at 5:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called the number a guy had given me at a bar last night. I got the Soulja Boy Hotline. Now every few hours I get messages on my phone like 'Good morning! Jump on up and get yo swag on, this is Soulja Boy!' and I can't seem to get it to stop. FML

by rain / 05/31/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

by deucelututi / 05/31/2009 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I was pulling my trolley luggage at the airport when I passed 2 cute girls smiling at me. Thinking I looked real cool, I kept on walking without paying heed to anything else. Then my brother shouted asking me what was I doing, only to realise that the handle had come off a few metres back. FML

by NotSoCool / 05/15/2009 at 12:41am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching 24 and realized that Jack Bauer had gotten more action in 5 hours than I had in 5 months. FML

by Noname / 02/08/2009 at 2:39am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to play with my Wii using the TV remote. FML

by Rush Snake / 01/04/2009 at 10:57pm / Geek

Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the arse. FML

by AgathedeBlouse / 11/18/2008 at 1:42am / Animals