Usuario

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Offline (the 08/01/2016 at 9:40pm)

Usuario

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 June 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3814
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Usuario : Hello

Usuario's page activity

Visits<b>klawzor</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 9:40pm<b>Steffi3</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:40am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:08am<b>Thorzix</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 7:29am<b>akosua</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 4:50am<b>SuckyFMLs</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 2:37pm<b>jinx1995</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 5:23pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:02am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 3:04am<b>rabechan</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 1:00am<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:18pm<b>Le_Doctor</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 1:37am<b>dre82</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 9:22am<b>groovy579</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 10:40pm<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 1:24pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 9:00pm<b>alienpotatochips</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 8:37pm<b>beenfreezin</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 6:58pm

Fucked!<b>klawzor</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 3:40am

Usuario's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of Usuario's badges

Usuario's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl punched me square in the face, effectively leaving it with purple swellings because I called her boyfriend an "uncle". Said boyfriend IS my uncle. FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML

by Badam / 03/29/2013 at 9:29pm / France (Aquitaine) / Love

Today, after working out at the gym, I went to grab my bag, and realized that my phone was missing. Panicking, I reached into my pocket, pulled out my phone, and dialed my mom's number to tell her I'd lost it. It took me until the last ring to realize what I was doing. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

by xtammyle / 02/19/2013 at 2:01am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, whilst on a phone interview with a college I really want to go to, my mother picks up the other line and shouts into the phone "She's not going to college, she's lazy and she'll only disappoint you." The interviewer hung up before I could say anything. FML

by parentalissues / 02/15/2013 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 5:30am / United States (Kansas) / Health

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

by poorkids / 10/31/2012 at 1:01am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

by wtf yourself, cunt / 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML

by Deadcat101 / 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, for my birthday, my family offered to take one of my friends to the movies with me. I had to pay a random person in my class to pose as a friend of mine, so that I wouldn't look pathetic in front of my parents. She forgot my name three times. They didn't buy it. FML

by Nofriends / 07/09/2012 at 7:44am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML

by offended / 06/14/2012 at 4:11am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

by lol112 / 06/02/2012 at 8:47am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

by jackmehoffa / 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I posted on Facebook saying I'm in a new relationship. One of my buddies said, "You're cheating on Jill?" My girlfriend saw this and went completely nuts, not giving me a chance to explain that "Jill" is just a euphemism for your hand. FML

by jackmehoffa / 04/03/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love