About UrNotFunny : If you think you're a grammar Nazi just because you can differentiate between "your" and "you're", kindly fuck off and die.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was skiing in Vermont for the third day straight. Since I was getting very little sleep, on the top of the chairlift I let out a huge yawn, pulling a muscle in my face. As I slid down the ramp, everyone saw me thrashing my head around and making funny, painful faces as I fell down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13193) - you deserved it (3236)
On 02/15/2010 at 8:35am - misc - by Floof (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my boyfriend and I went on a 1 day cruise to the Bahamas. It happened to be on the same day of the worst sailing conditions. We spent 6 hours throwing up together. Him into the sink, and me into the toilet. We spent $200 to see the inside of our cabin's bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16823) - you deserved it (2221)
On 02/15/2010 at 12:03am - love - by SeaSick (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18572) - you deserved it (5261)
On 02/14/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by freakingow (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30089) - you deserved it (2505)
On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States
Today, it was my turn to take out the trash. While walking to the dumpster, I slip and fall. It doesn't really hurt, so I get up and go to the dumpster, but the top is frozen stuck. It won't budge. Then I really pull with a lot of force, and the lid swings open and busts my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14989) - you deserved it (2536)
On 02/13/2010 at 8:44am - misc - by lolographic24 - Norway (Oslo)
Today, I was riding the bus. Suddenly, it appeared to start to snow inside the bus, and I assumed a window was open. When I looked up however, I discovered the girl in front of me putting her hair up in a ponytail. The so-called "snow" was coming off of her head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20648) - you deserved it (1245)
On 02/12/2010 at 7:04pm - misc - by ummmmEW - United States (Michigan)
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25280) - you deserved it (1957)
On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, we had our second snow day in a row, something that never happens. So while the rest of school got to sleep late, I had to wake up early, get dressed, and go to my bus stop because my mom didn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19001) - you deserved it (2002)
On 02/12/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by goestoschoolonsnowdays - United States (New York)
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27841) - you deserved it (4180)
On 02/10/2010 at 2:29am - love - by LoveStruck- - United States
Today, I noticed that my neighbor's house has a clear view of my daughter's bathroom. There is a telescope in his window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28861) - you deserved it (1842)
On 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by disasterbutton (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mother told me that the carbon-monoxide alarm went off last night, but since she didn't smell any gas, she decided to just remove the batteries and go back to bed. I had to explain to her that you can't smell carbon monoxide, and that we could have died in our sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34709) - you deserved it (1534)
On 02/06/2010 at 1:22pm - misc - by Kelso (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to be romantic, got up behind her and tried to swing her back down onto the bed and kiss her simultaneously, misjudged the distance and threw her into the wall, her head then bounced off the wall and into my forehead, spraining her nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6477) - you deserved it (17306)
On 09/21/2009 at 3:08pm - intimacy - by dontpanic (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I saw a YouTube video of a guy scratching a knife and a screwdriver on his iPod, and at the end he showed how there were no scratches and the screen was still clean. I took my iPod touch and did the same with a knife. It didn't work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12189) - you deserved it (199162)
On 09/19/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by MgmEboy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my mother finally pressured me to wear my old helmet while riding my bike. Halfway through my ride, 3 spiders came crawling out of it and onto my face, causing me to lose control of the bike and crash head-first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34421) - you deserved it (5329)
On 08/31/2009 at 8:44am - animals - by phlyingphuck (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I gathered the courage to ask my crush on a date. As I called her, she quickly answered and said "Can't talk right now, I'm in a movie theater." and then hung up. I'd called her home phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31214) - you deserved it (2019)
On 08/21/2009 at 11:36am - love - by sophistication (man) - United States (Illinois)
Friday 24 May 2013
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