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Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28067) - you deserved it (4809)
On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was having sex with a really hot guy, when suddenly he pulled out and told me that "he had another fat chick meeting him in twenty minutes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27070) - you deserved it (10609)
On 08/29/2010 at 3:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28664) - you deserved it (19838)
On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31169) - you deserved it (5737)
On 08/19/2010 at 1:26am - love - by Single - United States (California)
Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48184) - you deserved it (2705)
On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend's mom and dad walked in on us while we were playing naked twister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15794) - you deserved it (21895)
On 08/12/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by FML (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28740) - you deserved it (5839)
On 08/11/2010 at 9:54pm - intimacy - by oumalina (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33568) - you deserved it (3574)
On 08/11/2010 at 6:40am - love - by gutsforme (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my boyfriend started talking to my breasts in public. As if that wasn't bad enough, he then started to jiggle them in his hands. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21212) - you deserved it (10179)
On 08/11/2010 at 5:16am - intimacy - by KBL3 (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24787) - you deserved it (24645)
On 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by kinky - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she "likes my lips and wants to rape me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32221) - you deserved it (2772)
On 08/04/2010 at 3:58am - intimacy - by IllJustGetYouASweaterThen (man) - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28391) - you deserved it (10082)
On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was showing a house to a couple who were interested in buying. At least they "were" interested until they opened the blinds, looked out of the bedroom window and saw the neighbor on the toilet taking a dump. He was naked. He was hairy. He smiled and waved. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27293) - you deserved it (2314)
On 07/25/2010 at 8:07pm - work - by anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13548) - you deserved it (52557)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10066) - you deserved it (32884)
On 07/20/2010 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Monday 20 May 2013
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