Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About The_Weirdo : Am I strange? Yes. Do I hate you? Depends. If I offend you, there is either a good reason(like you were being a dumbass) or I'm in a bad mood. I like pretty much everyone, except the total dipshits. Of course, there are a lot of dipshits, so I don't really like people after all. Oh well, if we can have a logical argument, I suppose you aren't all that bad. Reason FTW!
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
50 quality responses
Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Today, my 3 year old son's tricycle was stolen. I looked up the street and saw a neighbour's kid riding it. I marched up, gently lifted him off it, gave him a stern lecture about stealing and brought the tricycle back home. The cops then showed up. Apparently, the kid has an identical tricycle. FML
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
Today, I took my new boyfriend to a family dinner. Despite having made everyone agree to be on their best behavior, my grandma spewed obscenities such as "fuck me sideways, aren't you a catch?" and "you just can't pull ass like that at my age" throughout. FML
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML
Wednesday 20 May 2015