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The_Instigator

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The_Instigator

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 17 January 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3054
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About The_Instigator : I'm that guy who always tangles your headphones when you're not paying attention.

The_Instigator's page activity

Visits<b>abattior</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 3:22am<b>wondercat40</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 11:15am<b>BlueFlatts</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:41am<b>Linksavestheday</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 6:15pm<b>Paradoxify</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:39pm<b>octopussperm125</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 8:31pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 6:11am<b>hghrider123456</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 9:41pm<b>Franniee_</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 7:27pm<b>shellykjelly</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 9:25pm<b>Schaus</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:16pm<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/15/2013 at 4:24pm<b>Audiobliss</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 6:57pm<b>perdix</b> - the 12/06/2011 at 6:02am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 11/14/2011 at 9:34am<b>Miaoudeminou</b> - the 10/19/2011 at 1:09pm<b>NPN_Scorpio</b> - the 10/16/2011 at 12:14pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 10/15/2011 at 2:26pm

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The_Instigator's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

#19697677
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23116) - you deserved it (2454)

On 05/29/2012 at 3:54am - health - by sopheeah - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (3866)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
406 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38122) - you deserved it (5625)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33153) - you deserved it (9182)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42250) - you deserved it (5141)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I got kicked in the crotch by a horse in my backyard. I don't own a horse. FML

#18444351
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33224) - you deserved it (2803)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:54am - animals - by Rash (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42603) - you deserved it (4947)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my brother lost his first tooth, so I told him the tooth fairy is going to give him money. He now thinks The Rock is going to show up in his room. FML

#18327184
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30479) - you deserved it (6378)

On 11/23/2011 at 2:14pm - kids - by G. Briones -

Today, I was pulled over. The cop seemed very familiar. Turns out he was a relative of mine whom I haven't spoken to in a very long time. We had decent conversation and caught up. He still gave me a ticket. FML

#18315687
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24034) - you deserved it (15804)

On 11/22/2011 at 10:09am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

#18314611
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34773) - you deserved it (11612)

On 11/22/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by toomuch (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was caught stealing a video game. I realized after my parents were called that the case was actually empty. FML

#18299655
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6580) - you deserved it (79795)

On 11/20/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by Emil - United States

Today, I learned that my roommate, the one in charge of the cooking, never washes her hands beforehand. According to her, it boosts her immune system. FML

#18297525
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25445) - you deserved it (3628)

On 11/20/2011 at 12:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I caught my husband once again looking at half naked pictures of a friend of mine on Facebook. When I asked why he did it, he said "I was checking to see if they were still there." FML

#18296145
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27403) - you deserved it (4500)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:31am - love - by anonymous - United States

Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML

#18295941
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29841) - you deserved it (4322)

On 11/20/2011 at 5:23am - love - by Stinky (woman) - United States (California)

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class which I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

#18285625
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35068) - you deserved it (8151)

On 11/18/2011 at 11:54pm - misc - by dan - Reserved



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