Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

The_Curvy_Girl

Offline (the 12/21/2015 at 7:02am) | Search for a member

The_Curvy_Girl

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3036
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About The_Curvy_Girl : Attack on Titan, Blue Exorcist, Vampire Knight, FairyTail, Full Metal Alchemist, Tokyo Ghoul, Black Butler

The_Curvy_Girl's page activity

Visits<b>Damned_Architect</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 3:48am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 9:42am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 7:29am<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 4:42am<b>Callilah</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 11:11am<b>therealjc</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 8:30pm<b>jerzjay</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:14am<b>TheDude992</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 5:34pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 12:46am<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:45pm<b>HeyBaeItsCae</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 3:24pm<b>Jason89</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:40pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:40pm<b>luebbe</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:53am<b>FrostyKittens</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 1:29am<b>Amm6ie</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 2:53pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 2:24pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 7:07pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 1:29pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:05am<b>luebbe</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:54am<b>therealjc</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 6:30pm

The_Curvy_Girl's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of The_Curvy_Girl's badges

The_Curvy_Girl's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my boyfriend to a family dinner. It went well, until my dad got drunk and started telling everyone about how "midgets" are assholes and are ruining America. FML

#21464495
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21145) - you deserved it (1613)

On 09/04/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by FML (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend has been sulking like a moody kid all day, all because I won't set my phone background to a picture of his dick. FML

#21464487
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25627) - you deserved it (2995)

On 09/04/2015 at 11:58am - intimacy - by natalyV (woman) -

Today, I discovered that my 100-pound Rottweiler is absolutely terrified of (drumroll please) orange peels. Yup. A byproduct of my lunch will turn this hulking monolith with teeth into a whimpering puddle of pee. FML

#21463927
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24139) - you deserved it (2042)

On 09/02/2015 at 10:30pm - animals - by pansypup - United States (New Mexico)

Today, the priest at my wedding farted. Everyone thought it was me. The guests, my bride, even the priest himself looked at me in disgust before continuing. FML

#21463909
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28070) - you deserved it (1627)

On 09/02/2015 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, I pushed all the way in. She said, "Stop teasing me, put everything in." FML

#21454970
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38204) - you deserved it (4185)

On 08/11/2015 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, at Subway, the pretty girl serving made me so nervous by that I forgot what cucumbers were called. FML

#21454765
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21427) - you deserved it (3421)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:22pm - misc - by it's awkward - United States (California)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

#21430214
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25843) - you deserved it (4905)

On 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm - health - by oh no (man) - United States (California)

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML

#21430016
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30629) - you deserved it (3917)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:35am - work - by Iamsosorry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML

#21429236
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28329) - you deserved it (4150)

On 06/20/2015 at 9:59pm - love - by hotheadslav - United States (Indiana)

Today, I decided to do naked yoga in my lounge room, as I always do. Later, I found a note on my front door saying "Keep doing what you're doing". FML

#21428771
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26525) - you deserved it (8770)

On 06/19/2015 at 9:06pm - misc - by jenpearl (woman) - Australia

Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML

#21428714
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28279) - you deserved it (4100)

On 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by baberuth - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

#21428553
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33485) - you deserved it (13990)

On 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by shmarf (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, as I finished my piano recital and took a bow, I farted into the microphone. FML

#21428226
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31164) - you deserved it (4138)

On 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm - work - by fartypants - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31957) - you deserved it (9232)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -

Today, I found out that my husband really thinks onion rings are seafood. He's 36. FML

#21422504
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24039) - you deserved it (2376)

On 06/07/2015 at 8:53pm - misc - by onionrings (woman) - United States (Texas)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: