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TheNewGuy03

Offline (the 05/27/2015 at 6:36pm) | Search for a member

TheNewGuy03

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 13 October 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9940
  • Number of comments : 2035
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About TheNewGuy03 : http://rearnakedjoke.net/
http://www.facebook.com/LeftHandRightHand

Writer, photographer, lover, and fighter.
Feel free to drop a line if you feel inclined.

|the kid|

TheNewGuy03's page activity

Visits<b>missa8604</b> - yesterday at 12:36am<b>FiFiLovee</b> - yesterday at 2:01pm<b>sam882</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 2:00am<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:49am<b>afranklin212</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 12:18am<b>luridz</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:46pm<b>DejaRenee</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:04pm<b>Abdallah0</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:46pm<b>docsnow84</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:20pm<b>FatKitty</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 1:58pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:48pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 10:32am<b>bosfk</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 9:17am<b>lovegrn18</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 11:42pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 7:58am<b>Novadi</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:44pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 8:05am<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:31am

Fucked!<b>FiFiLovee</b> - yesterday at 8:01pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:53am

TheNewGuy03's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of TheNewGuy03's badges

TheNewGuy03's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89487) - you deserved it (13973)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML

#17711935
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27703) - you deserved it (2694)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

#17706134
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15432) - you deserved it (49420)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by omfgnooo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

#17365713
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10429) - you deserved it (75161)

On 08/04/2011 at 10:35am - misc - by jshi8 - United States (Maryland)

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36827) - you deserved it (3706)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML

#17253046
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12403) - you deserved it (56801)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38220) - you deserved it (3363)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40416) - you deserved it (6223)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
444 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64757) - you deserved it (6758)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML

#16671761
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38513) - you deserved it (3574)

On 06/15/2011 at 1:46am - work - by MegaBear - United States

Today, I got pulled over for going about 88mph. When the cop asked why I was speeding, I replied, "I was trying to go back in time". He didn't like that answer and gave me a ticket. FML

#16248002
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11367) - you deserved it (63656)

On 05/19/2011 at 1:30am - work - by 613tanner -

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49459) - you deserved it (5807)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML

#15912544
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32502) - you deserved it (3609)

On 04/24/2011 at 9:11pm - animals - by electricpuddle -

Today, my mom confused me with my dad. She got in the shower with me. FML

#15883377
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84203) - you deserved it (6315)

On 04/22/2011 at 7:11am - intimacy - by Damian -

Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML

#15693766
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24695) - you deserved it (3584)

On 04/08/2011 at 12:09pm - health - by jonh_215 - United States



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