TheNewGuy03

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Offline (the 11/30/2016 at 2:08am)

TheNewGuy03

103Fucked!

TheNewGuy03TheNewGuy03
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 13 October 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13380
  • Number of comments : 2752
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 23 posted

About TheNewGuy03 : Site: http://rearnakedjoke.net/
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/ClaytonJonesImages
Prints/Merch: http://society6.com/claytonjones
IG: @ClaytonJonesImages
iStock: thenewguy03

Writer, photographer, lover, and fighter.
Feel free to drop a line if you feel inclined.

|the kid|

TheNewGuy03's page activity

Visits<b>zoza7oss</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 9:55am<b>assem977</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 2:06pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 3:43am<b>laurellkawes</b> - the 11/11/2016 at 8:56am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 10/18/2016 at 5:08am<b>Reely_queenie</b> - the 10/16/2016 at 12:25pm<b>WCARlover</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 11:17pm<b>magicdust95</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 8:49am<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 10/11/2016 at 7:59am<b>French_giirl</b> - the 10/09/2016 at 4:46pm<b>ThePaperDragon</b> - the 10/07/2016 at 9:42am<b>ChewyGranola</b> - the 10/05/2016 at 7:44pm<b>vhsjulia</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 1:15am<b>iheartbananas</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 12:28pm<b>bambi1989</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 12:01pm<b>RectumRecker</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 7:50am<b>jforren</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 6:56am<b>Participation</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 3:02pm

Fucked!<b>magicdust95</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 2:49pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 3:43am<b>That1One1Chick</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 6:42am<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 6:06pm<b>C8H18</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 2:32am<b>OlRed</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 1:07pm<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 8:38pm<b>interesting33</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 10:25pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 3:55am<b>Dreamer_in_Time</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 6:20am<b>maggeei</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 2:15am<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 12:33am<b>marshm610</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 11:55pm<b>squilliam214</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 4:24pm<b>xSlyx</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 8:56am<b>Kira1965</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 7:51am<b>thejonac</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 10:47am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 1:38am

TheNewGuy03's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of TheNewGuy03's badges

TheNewGuy03's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my 6-year-old daughter touched a tray I'd just pulled out of the oven. I quickly swatted her hand away, but then noticed she wasn't hurt or burned at all. I then gingerly touched the tray and got scalded. My daughter giggled maniacally as I screamed. To be honest, I'm now terrified of her. FML

by :| / 09/26/2015 at 12:10am / New Zealand (Nelson) / Kids

Today, my dad's order of hair clippers arrived. I've been putting off getting a haircut for a while now, and he offered to give me one for free. Long story short, he managed to ruin the hair clippers, and I now look like a diseased palm tree. FML

by paaaallllmmmssss / 09/25/2015 at 11:40pm / South Africa (Gauteng) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a call from my wife. It would've been great if she hadn't left on a business trip 3 years ago. FML

by TheLoneSoul / 09/13/2015 at 10:22am / France / Love

Today, I was lying on a couch, reading, when I noticed a spindly leg poking round the corner of my book. Upon realising it was a spider, I calmly and rationally threw my book across the room, breaking the TV. FML

by Annie / 08/24/2015 at 4:46am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to upgrade to Windows 10. I wanted to keep my old files on the current hard drive, I clicked on the keep old files option. Thanks to Windows, I lost everything. FML

by Arrkyna / 08/23/2015 at 1:42pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2015 at 2:32am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Love

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2014 at 9:17am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

by Pandamomma / 07/21/2014 at 8:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I was lost in a foreign city so I asked a girl for directions. She replied, "Directions? ONE DIRECTION!" and started screaming in my face and jumping around. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2013 at 5:17am / United States / Kids

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

by anon / 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm / United States / Health

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy