About TheFlyingMan : Hi. I'm Danii from Australia, don't let my profile pic scare you away, I'm not that slutty.
I like puppies, kittens, babies, belly button piercings, sex and my friends.
I hate when people put YDI in an FML which didn't deserve it. I hate MLIA because they've changed for the worse.
I looooove you
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Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25909) - you deserved it (2316)
On 12/23/2011 at 5:53am - love - by johncabbot25 (man) - Canada
Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5889) - you deserved it (52571)
On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28245) - you deserved it (4224)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (2822)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36940) - you deserved it (2822)
On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, I discovered that you should always unplug the electric mixer before licking the beaters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8101) - you deserved it (52503)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by seanjohn268 (man) - Canada
Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22544) - you deserved it (1410)
On 11/29/2011 at 12:34am - work - by kait - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22752) - you deserved it (6679)
Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14784) - you deserved it (57452)
On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22712) - you deserved it (2493)
On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States
Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get their insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your f*cking car and get the f*ck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10306) - you deserved it (23226)
On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (4554)
On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)
Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (4554)
On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)
I agree, your life sucks (9374) - you deserved it (21425)
On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28901) - you deserved it (7064)
On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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