Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheFlyingMan

Search for a member

TheFlyingMan

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 February 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1691
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About TheFlyingMan : Hi. I'm Danii from Australia, don't let my profile pic scare you away, I'm not that slutty.

I like puppies, kittens, babies, belly button piercings, sex and my friends.

I hate when people put YDI in an FML which didn't deserve it. I hate MLIA because they've changed for the worse.

I looooove you

TheFlyingMan's page activity

Visits<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 8:13pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:57am<b>amp4942</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 6:51pm<b>guavamoose</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:07pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 11:18am<b>superrocket19</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:36pm<b>Liamj774</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 7:30pm<b>ComradeNeal</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 9:09am<b>PageantGirlXOXO</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 8:25am<b>yonahd18</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 7:42pm<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 4:22pm<b>ezrocks4u</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 1:45am<b>scooterdude720</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 12:46am<b>shucks101</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 2:51pm<b>skychu</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 11:39pm<b>jo0owe</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 7:13am<b>Betterthanu123</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 12:53pm<b>JD1147</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 4:43am

TheFlyingMan's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of TheFlyingMan's badges

TheFlyingMan's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML

#18586943
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31225) - you deserved it (3045)

On 12/23/2011 at 5:53am - love - by johncabbot25 (man) - Canada

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7790) - you deserved it (71065)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML

#18424898
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34459) - you deserved it (5668)

On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43167) - you deserved it (3235)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43167) - you deserved it (3235)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I discovered that you should always unplug the electric mixer before licking the beaters. FML

#18384979
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9531) - you deserved it (59122)

On 11/29/2011 at 12:21pm - misc - by seanjohn268 (man) - Canada

Today, at work, an overweight man riding an electric cart started peeing all around the store. I had to clean it up. FML

#18381890
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27627) - you deserved it (1949)

On 11/29/2011 at 12:34am - work - by kait - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

#18374141
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28569) - you deserved it (8613)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:34am - misc - by Dani - Reserved

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18106) - you deserved it (76684)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28158) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML

#18091969
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13348) - you deserved it (33206)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29170) - you deserved it (5979)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29170) - you deserved it (5979)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11912) - you deserved it (31034)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

#17659578
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35956) - you deserved it (9402)

On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: