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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I was working at Old Navy. A girl came up to me and did a bizarre dance. Not knowing how to react, I imitated her to be friendly with the customer. Then she stopped cold. Her friend stormed up to me and yelled, "you jerk! Why are you mocking her? She has tourettes you know!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (40272) - you deserved it (32505)
On 03/08/2009 at 8:00pm - work - by Ricky (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, at the restaurant where I work, I served a table of 4 middle-age women. Before greeting the table, I was deciding between saying "Can I get you anything to drink?" and "Can I start you off with something?" My actual greeting? "Can I get you ladies off?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (36575) - you deserved it (15275)
On 03/08/2009 at 5:02pm - misc - by serverdessert - United States (Maryland)
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55310) - you deserved it (15606)
On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55310) - you deserved it (15606)
On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States
Today, I was reading my girlfriend's girly magazine. There was an article stating that if a girl tells a guy his dick is the perfect size, she really means that it is too small. My girlfriend claims everything in the magazine is right. She told me my dick was the perfect size last weekend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59076) - you deserved it (6649)
On 03/08/2009 at 5:14am - intimacy - by JP (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a 'talk.' Now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48906) - you deserved it (56830)
On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38624) - you deserved it (8003)
On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was going over to my friends house for dinner, (it was my birthday) when I walked in everyone yelled surprise and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me she said "wrong person guys, turn off the lights". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48082) - you deserved it (2150)
On 03/08/2009 at 3:16am - misc - by PmS (woman) - United States (Wyoming)
Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47517) - you deserved it (3043)
On 03/07/2009 at 11:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I left my parents house to drive 90 minutes back to college. As I was getting off the exit for my school, I realized I left my bright pink vibrator sitting on my dresser back at home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16664) - you deserved it (57552)
On 03/07/2009 at 8:15pm - intimacy - by vibratorgirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I called to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said 'Mommy, I don't want to leave.' She wasn't talking to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (111672) - you deserved it (7035)
On 03/07/2009 at 3:15pm - kids - by divorced (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and i told the waiter I'll have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, " Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51687) - you deserved it (6340)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:36pm - love - by Kate (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (83413) - you deserved it (15547)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I couldn't answer almost any of the questions in the game "Are You Smarter Than A 5th Grader?" I'm a 40 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11815) - you deserved it (43061)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by laywer_man (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got a letter from my college saying that if my tuition was not paid in the next 24 hours, I will be terminated from classes. Turns out account services has been depositing my tuition money in another student’s account whose social security number was one digit different from mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65438) - you deserved it (1940)
On 03/06/2009 at 8:48pm - money - by collegedoesntwantme (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Friday 24 May 2013
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