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TheCamoWulf

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TheCamoWulf
  • Town/Country : Nevermore, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9404
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

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TheCamoWulf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to my mother about my sex life, telling her "if I want to have sex I'm going to have sex." She looked at me for a moment and said, "You're staying a virgin until you marry". She wasn't ordering me, she was informing me. FML

#3452744
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33799) - you deserved it (7346)

On 07/03/2009 at 11:47am - intimacy - by senelbeat - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went on an excellent first date. After the 'end of the date kiss' came "I suppose this is where I tell you that I'm married". FML

#3447565
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51894) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/03/2009 at 3:24am - love - by hannaholic (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

#3446462
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9052) - you deserved it (41951)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:29am - love - by pinkrazrgirl247 - United States

Today, I found some Nesquick Chocolate Milk mix in my pantry which sounded good. While making a glass, I got angry because not all of the mix would disolve. Frustrated, I downed the drink. When I finished I looked in the glass and realized the mix that wouldn't disolve was actually tiny ants. FML

#3437609
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36127) - you deserved it (11596)

On 07/02/2009 at 9:37pm - misc - by ChocoMilkManG (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend left me. The reason? She's not actually a lesbian. She has been using our relationship to piss off her conservative parents. We've been together for over a year, and I've been in love with her for over five. FML

#3437520
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60998) - you deserved it (7196)

On 07/02/2009 at 9:33pm - love - by heart-broken (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was working at the library. Some punks thought it would be funny to shit in a book, close it and return it in the drop box. The fact that it was sitting outside in the ninety degree heat for a couple hours did not help the stench; it was everywhere and I had to clean the mess. FML

#3435644
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50215) - you deserved it (2237)

On 07/02/2009 at 8:18pm - work - by alwaysxgettingxshitxon (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while watching The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh with my 5 year old, I realized why the kangaroo's name is Kanga, and why her son's name is Roo. Kanga-Roo. Get it? Yeah. I didn't until today. I'm 47. FML

#3430057
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19655) - you deserved it (46800)

On 07/02/2009 at 4:33pm - misc - by slightlyslow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the doctor. I told her I felt down all the time. She asked me a few questions and she told me I was depressed. She suggested to go home and find the sources of my depression. When I told my parents, they started laughing and said "Yeah, right." I think I found my source. FML

#3429206
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42514) - you deserved it (2489)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by farrahfarrest_ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my sister just had a huge fight with my mom. After that, she thought it was appropriate to smash my $1,000 guitar to "blow off some steam." FML

#3428912
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62980) - you deserved it (2328)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:34pm - misc - by daRN (man) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, I called back a number I recently missed a call from. To my surprise, it was the number of my boyfriend's fiancé. I've been with him 4 years, he's been with her for 6. Turns out, not only is he a cheating jerk, but technically I'M the other woman. FML

#3423301
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53453) - you deserved it (4302)

On 07/02/2009 at 9:31am - love - by Anna (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML

#3419869
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40978) - you deserved it (8258)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:22am - misc - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States (California)

Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML

#3419869
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40978) - you deserved it (8258)

On 07/02/2009 at 3:22am - misc - by DaveAlmighty (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the doctor for a sports physical. I've had a giant, dark birthmark on my left rib cage that I've hated most of my life. Recently I've learned to embrace it and show it off by wearing bikinis. My doctor saw it today and told me it's a fungus that's been spreading on my side all my life. FML

#3400206
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53087) - you deserved it (5883)

On 07/01/2009 at 4:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML

#3382382
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54905) - you deserved it (1990)

On 07/01/2009 at 12:08am - misc - by lawoman27 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

#3373378
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14125) - you deserved it (47123)

On 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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