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TheCamoWulf's favorite FMLs
by Lilly / 10/02/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Arkansas) / Love
Today, my bully made me cry once again. It's been going on for weeks. I don't know who to turn to; I can't say anything because I'd get into even more trouble. He even stole my Nintendo 3DS and won't give it back. My bully is my girlfriend's son. He's 10. FML
by PickedOnByDamien / 10/02/2013 at 4:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by BasketGhost / 10/02/2013 at 2:36am / United States (New York) / Animals
by kelbel89 / 10/01/2013 at 5:46pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/01/2013 at 4:25pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love
by Ggirl / 10/01/2013 at 3:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was in an Austrian bar, making polite conversation in my broken German with a slightly odd middle-aged man. He said, winking, that he was near to his pension. I smiled and nodded, thinking he was talking about retirement. My friend later informed me that 'pension' is German for 'apartment'. Ew. FML
by Anonymous / 10/01/2013 at 3:30am / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML
by anonymous / 10/01/2013 at 1:36am / United States (West Virginia) / Love
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my daughter trying to cut her wrist with a plastic spoon. When I asked her why, she said her friend Lucy did that so her parents would buy her pretty things. My daughter and Lucy are both four years old. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 7:54pm / United Kingdom (West Lothian) / Kids
by DOCMONROE / 09/30/2013 at 6:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 12:23pm / United States (Oregon) / Animals
Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 12:22pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by sothisishowidie / 09/30/2013 at 7:18am / Guam / Miscellaneous
by meens42 / 09/30/2013 at 4:04am / United States / Kids
by NotSoTypical / 09/29/2013 at 7:30pm / United States / Money
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…