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Tgo19053

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Tgo19053
  • Town/Country : Trevose, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 June 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 987
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Tgo19053's favorite FMLs

Today, I downloaded an application that notifies me when my phone is fully charged. I had no idea how it actually functions, but I plugged the charger in and went to bed. A couple of hours later, I woke up to a man's voice screaming, "I can't take it anymore!" I nearly wet myself. FML

#19207930
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26894) - you deserved it (8841)

On 03/03/2012 at 8:55am - misc - by scaredshitless (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

#19117009
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23890) - you deserved it (4003)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada

Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML

#19109077
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19353) - you deserved it (1729)

On 02/18/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by district12 (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I had to chase my naked brothers around my house for twenty minutes, trying to get them to take a bath, all while they were chasing my best friend around yelling, "IT'S WIENER TIME!" FML

#19076647
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22295) - you deserved it (2338)

On 02/14/2012 at 5:29pm - kids - by ShylaMarie - Canada

Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML

#18958302
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19566) - you deserved it (3984)

On 01/31/2012 at 1:22am - kids - by beautifulme (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML

#18625590
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31229) - you deserved it (5111)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36056) - you deserved it (9016)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while watching a man in front of me on the bus remove his cap to scratch his noggin, I noticed the swarm of dandruff that was about to nail me in my face. FML

#18306908
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (1959)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my dog is an aspiring underwear designer, her latest project being creating crotchless underwear. Mine seem to have been used as prototypes. FML

#18200720
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23701) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/09/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by blacktyaffair - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31181) - you deserved it (8636)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28506) - you deserved it (2934)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while standing in line at the supermarket, I reached past my wife to get a pack of gum. She jokingly did the "battered wife flinch" to get a laugh, and smiled at me from behind her hand. The cop staring at us obviously didn't notice the smile and definitely didn't think it was funny. FML

#18120236
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24158) - you deserved it (3271)

On 10/31/2011 at 11:07am - misc - by spacemanspiff78 (man) -

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39429) - you deserved it (18404)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML

#18043699
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16214) - you deserved it (46479)

On 10/22/2011 at 2:10am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I ate a bowl of my girlfriend's homemade chili. She went a little heavy on the spices, but I ate it anyway. An hour later, I can now say that if it burns going in, it will explode coming out your rear. FML

#18038631
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24311) - you deserved it (4017)

On 10/21/2011 at 1:19pm - health - by DMStarsky - United States (Texas)



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