Tequilamockngbrd

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Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 7:49am)

Tequilamockngbrd

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7326
  • Number of comments : 181
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tequilamockngbrd : Blah.

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Have a great day. :D

Tequilamockngbrd's page activity

Visits<b>apple97</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 3:57pm<b>TisButAScratch</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 3:33pm<b>sylverstar</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:25pm<b>kaylocca</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 8:45am<b>pear_flavored</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 7:57pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 4:50am<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:53am<b>sarika</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:05am<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 5:04am<b>itsalie</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 11:34pm<b>LeenYa</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 8:05pm<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 4:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 2:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:06am<b>TheDvsOne</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:49am<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:06pm<b>IAmZim</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 9:15am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 4:58pm

Fucked!<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 8:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 2:06pm

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Tequilamockngbrd's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML

by Anonymous / 10/09/2009 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (Greater London) / Animals

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML

by TasedAndDazed / 10/09/2009 at 11:05am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I was pretending to be a monkey for a "documentary". The branch snapped and I fell out of the tree and onto a car roof. It was after school, I fell onto the dean's BMW. The video was on facebook before I regained consciousness. FML

by jane / 10/09/2009 at 10:04am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2009 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I was at the Salvation Army when I saw a wheelchair in the miscellaneous aisle. I thought it would be fun to ride around in it. As I was wheeling it back to where I found it, I made it back just as it's owner was hobbling out of the dressing room. FML

by imok / 10/07/2009 at 1:58pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML

by shitballs_911 / 10/07/2009 at 7:13am / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting my niece when we decided to play hide and seek. I went in the shed, and waited. After waiting a while, I went to go back inside to see what was happening. I saw my niece had locked all the doors and was eating cookies on the kitchen bench. FML

by vbscb / 10/07/2009 at 6:42am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

by limecat / 10/06/2009 at 3:12am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fainted on the sidewalk. When I woke up, I was still lying on the sidewalk, people were stepping over me and my purse was gone. FML

by blackedout / 10/06/2009 at 1:25am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

by APetsPet / 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my parents asked if they could borrow my car. Why? Because they were going to see someone about a Craig's List ad and wanted to look poor. FML

by poorcar / 10/05/2009 at 3:38am / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall with a note saying "Sorry Dude". FML

by Anonymous / 10/05/2009 at 1:11am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, I was dining out with some friends when a hot guy on the table next to us smiled at me. Flattered, I smiled back at him several times. On his way out, he laid a napkin with his number at my table. I didn't notice, too busy looking at the yellow dress and the pink pumps he was wearing. FML

by badatgenders / 10/03/2009 at 6:49pm / Norway (Nord-Trondelag) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML

by Pwnedofthedead / 10/03/2009 at 11:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML

by asshole / 10/02/2009 at 1:34am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous