Tequilamockngbrd

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Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 7:49am)

Tequilamockngbrd

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7796
  • Number of comments : 181
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tequilamockngbrd : Blah.

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Have a great day. :D

Tequilamockngbrd's page activity

Visits<b>apple97</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 3:57pm<b>TisButAScratch</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 3:33pm<b>sylverstar</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:25pm<b>kaylocca</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 8:45am<b>pear_flavored</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 7:57pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 4:50am<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:53am<b>sarika</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:05am<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 5:04am<b>itsalie</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 11:34pm<b>LeenYa</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 8:05pm<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 4:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 2:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:06am<b>TheDvsOne</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:49am<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:06pm<b>IAmZim</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 9:15am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 4:58pm

Fucked!<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 8:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 2:06pm

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Tequilamockngbrd's favorite FMLs

Today, I got diagnosed with a condition that expresses itself in the form of violent diarrhea whenever I get nervous. Now I am constantly nervous about getting nervous about anything. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2009 at 9:36am / Sweden (Norrbottens Lan) / Health

Today, I was written up because my manager heard me insulting a customer. How did I insult her? I called her grandma. Who did I say this to? My grandma. FML

by booste / 10/18/2009 at 12:06am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML

by userrrrr / 10/17/2009 at 10:25pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

by hamster cookie / 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm / Kids

Today, I awoke to find a giant turd on my carpet, cat hair everywhere in my room, and a big hole in my window screen. I don't own a cat. FML

by Ethan / 10/17/2009 at 7:13am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a funny prank to put duct tape on my eyes while I was sleeping so that when I woke up, I would be blind. I have no more eyelashes. FML

by xXx / 10/16/2009 at 4:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a work meeting because our clientele is unhappy with our service. I was in there because I don't correct our customers when they get my name wrong. My name is Blane, but "Blair", "Blake", "Lane", and "Glenn" got rave reviews. No one picked up on this. I hate my job. FML

by Blanerd / 10/15/2009 at 8:33am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

by PanFace / 10/13/2009 at 2:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

by bubbles / 10/12/2009 at 1:36am / United States / Animals

Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML

by prickly / 10/11/2009 at 12:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing hysterically and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML

by foxbrat / 10/11/2009 at 2:18am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to see if electric dog collars work on human necks. They do. FML

by zappy / 10/11/2009 at 12:40am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

by BEE / 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally plucked up the courage to propose to my girlfriend of 7 months. I took her out to the park where we had our first kiss, I got down on one knee, and before I could say "Will you marry me" a bird shat on my head. FML

by -bird-poop- / 10/10/2009 at 8:52am / Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz) / Love