Tequilamockngbrd

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Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 7:49am)

Tequilamockngbrd

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8156
  • Number of comments : 181
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tequilamockngbrd : Blah.

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Have a great day. :D

Tequilamockngbrd's page activity

Visits<b>apple97</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 3:57pm<b>TisButAScratch</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 3:33pm<b>sylverstar</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:25pm<b>kaylocca</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 8:45am<b>pear_flavored</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 7:57pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 4:50am<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:53am<b>sarika</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:05am<b>SleepyPharma</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 5:04am<b>itsalie</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 11:34pm<b>LeenYa</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 8:05pm<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 4:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 2:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:06am<b>TheDvsOne</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 10:49am<b>Wutdafuqq</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:06pm<b>IAmZim</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 9:15am<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 4:58pm

Fucked!<b>blackneko</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:10pm<b>theBandit68</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 8:58am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 2:06pm

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Tequilamockngbrd's favorite FMLs

Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML

by magicman / 07/04/2012 at 5:04am / United States / Health

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2012 at 5:45am / Intimacy

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 1:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

by CantPublish / 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

by HOe HOe HOe / 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

by yum yogurt / 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2011 at 7:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, someone in my class wrote "Erase me if you can!" at the very top of the board, as I am always tormented about how short I am compared to everyone else. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't reach it. I'm the teacher. FML

by Petitprof / 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Miscellaneous

Today, a woman pushed me at the bar and told me how much she's always hated me. She was my grade five teacher. FML

by flurina / 12/18/2009 at 3:44pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2009 at 3:27pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into Old Navy to buy myself a pair of jingle jammies. Save yourself the embarrassment: don't shake the jammies in the middle of the store to hear the jingling, because these jammies do not jingle. You'll just look like an idiot. FML

by sarabalism / 12/17/2009 at 12:07am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to Victoria's Secret to get sized. I put the card that says my size in my pocket, then went to the movies with my boyfriend. When the person at the counter asked me to hand them my ticket, I reached into my pocket and handed it to them. It wasn't the ticket. It was my bra size. FML

by StrawberryJuicey / 12/13/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Kansas) / Love

Today, I was in a meeting at work. In the middle of our CEO's speech, I farted. Everyone heard including my boss, who looked over and said, "Do you have anything else you wanted to add?" FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2009 at 8:08am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was attending a drug-free lecture at school. The speaker said, "There are many ways to quit smoking. You can try patches, gum, or even quitting cold turkey. Any questions?" I raised my hand, and she called on me. I asked, "How does cold turkey help?" And then I realized. FML

by Anonymous / 12/09/2009 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Health