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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I have a tooth infection that's spread to my jaw and ear. It hurts so badly that I'm practically in tears. Today's also the day I found out I'm allergic to the medication I was prescribed. Everything hurts, I'm covered in hives, and I can't stop throwing up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25416) - you deserved it (1433)
On 11/16/2012 at 7:30pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Croatia (Primorsko-Goranska)
Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23693) - you deserved it (2155)
On 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by thanks, fuckface (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, while at a red light, a guy in a tux and sunglasses doing the Gangnam Style passed over the crossing, followed by a man with a video camera. This isn't the first time I've stopped for people doing a Gangnam Style parody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16315) - you deserved it (2512)
On 11/16/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Gangnam (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23539) - you deserved it (4053)
On 11/16/2012 at 4:40am - misc - by mfischer (man) - United States
Today, while in my room on the computer, I had a sudden urge to pee. I got up to use the loo and started hearing some disturbing noises from inside. Apparently I was so quiet my parents thought I was gone and decided to have sex in the shower. It's been an hour and my bladder is about to burst. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20989) - you deserved it (1528)
On 11/15/2012 at 2:23am - intimacy - by WentInABush (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I started at my first job. Within the first five minutes of arriving, I was followed around by a white guy who repeatedly sang to me, "Black people love making music" along with a few of his own songs. It resulted in me getting fired for bringing my "boyfriend" to work. I didn't even know him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17006) - you deserved it (1259)
On 11/14/2012 at 8:04pm - work - by sarahijklmnop (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I brought a fluorescent tube to the store to make sure I got the correct replacement. Trying to charm the sexy cashier, I waved the tube in the air, saying "I need a new light sabre, there is no force left in this one and the Empire is attacking." Turns out she'd never heard of Star Wars. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14073) - you deserved it (17494)
On 11/14/2012 at 6:39am - misc - by hclagopus (man) - Norway
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18501) - you deserved it (2540)
On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16863) - you deserved it (3274)
On 11/13/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by sarahcurtis213 - United States
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20435) - you deserved it (1706)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to go to my daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with my husband when we arrived. Apparently I "died" recently and my daughter has had extra responsibility around the house, hence why she doesn't come to class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20090) - you deserved it (1343)
On 11/08/2012 at 6:09am - kids - by Shauna (woman) - United States
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18442) - you deserved it (1727)
On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore
Today, while I was cleaning out my son's room, I came across his diary. Opening it out of curiosity, I found ramblings about how blacks, Jews, and other "inferior breeds" should be forcibly sterilized "for the common good." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19820) - you deserved it (6126)
On 11/04/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Ugh - United States (California)
Today, I realized that I'm a terrible human being. For the first time in my life, I gave some change to a homeless guy, but only so he'd get out of my face long enough for me to watch two other bums beating the crap out of each other over a sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3944) - you deserved it (18649)
On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by justcomesnaturally (woman) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I was stuck in the bathroom yelling for someone to get me toilet paper. My grandpa slips a small leaf under the door and says, "This is what I used in my day." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17225) - you deserved it (2921)
On 10/30/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by Obi1Shinobi - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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