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TehCookieMonster

Offline (the 08/15/2014 at 9:09am) | Search for a member

TehCookieMonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1774
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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TehCookieMonster's page activity

Visits<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:45pm<b>GentlemanBastard</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:55pm<b>alicespoons</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 4:16pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 11:59pm<b>LoveMeDontHateMe</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 1:40pm

TehCookieMonster's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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TehCookieMonster's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

#18813229
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29070) - you deserved it (23174)

On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31406) - you deserved it (3354)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML

#18795817
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21326) - you deserved it (2001)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML

#18793525
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28045) - you deserved it (3936)

On 01/13/2012 at 5:47am - intimacy - by doctorsandnurses (man) - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

#18785359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25196) - you deserved it (4837)

On 01/12/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I've had chairs thrown at me, kicks have hit me in the nuts and I've heard "I'm gonna fucking kill you, bitch" several times. I work at a kindergarten. And this is a good day compared to what I'm used to. FML

#18783134
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38135) - you deserved it (3342)

On 01/12/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML

#18781684
527 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30022) - you deserved it (53411)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:36am - love - by Nate (man) - United States

Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML

#18760852
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41525) - you deserved it (2227)

On 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by liLbob6598 - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

#18703291
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (27372)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

#18685700
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43449) - you deserved it (7097)

On 01/02/2012 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

#18633962
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29587) - you deserved it (21214)

On 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML

#18617176
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25277) - you deserved it (3832)

On 12/26/2011 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my friend told me how depressing it is that she hasn't had sex in two weeks. I haven't had sex in 3 years. FML

#18614402
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33769) - you deserved it (5245)

On 12/26/2011 at 6:48am - intimacy - by Sally - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

#18593025
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14381) - you deserved it (36504)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML

#18586943
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31217) - you deserved it (3045)

On 12/23/2011 at 5:53am - love - by johncabbot25 (man) - Canada



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