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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26811) - you deserved it (2758)
On 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML
I agree, your life sucks (21730) - you deserved it (5437)
On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States
Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19267) - you deserved it (3304)
On 03/14/2010 at 3:00am - love - by crapcrapcrap (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, after my first flight landed late, I burned out my lungs sprinting full speed for 10 minutes to catch my next flight. The gate number on my ticket was wrong. It had been changed to one right next to where I had originally pulled up to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20072) - you deserved it (2424)
On 02/21/2010 at 12:47am - misc - by mad flyer - Sent from mobile version
Today, I thought about my boyfriend and all the things we used to do together years ago. Today, I also spent the day doing my now husband's laundry and watching him sit on the couch with his hand inside his underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18269) - you deserved it (4154)
On 02/07/2010 at 12:15am - love - by Bruja5 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said 'Nice chair.' She replied 'Nice bruise' and punched me in the nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9370) - you deserved it (35520)
On 02/01/2010 at 12:15am - love - by Liam. - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was bet 100 dollars that I couldn't break a piece off a brick with my head. I couldn't, and I have 2 gashes in my head now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2610) - you deserved it (48627)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was riding my dorm elevator from the 5th floor to the 1st by myself. Since the elevator is really slow, I pulled my pants and underwear down just for kicks. Just then, the door opened to let a girl on at the 4th floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3253) - you deserved it (57006)
On 01/20/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by embareassed (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8121) - you deserved it (26603)
On 01/12/2010 at 5:26am - love - by awkward23 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was looking forward to coming home to a freshly-cooked meal. Coming home to a cowering dog, two inches of water on the floor, and being handed a mop is just as good, I guess. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16625) - you deserved it (2288)
On 01/07/2010 at 1:38pm - animals - by Flooded (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years because I was tired of his childishness and anger, so he decided to send me 540 random text messages of scrambled letters in order to mess up my phone as well, as make me pay 20 cents for each message. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20575) - you deserved it (3887)
On 01/07/2010 at 12:01am - love - by DeadBroke (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29924) - you deserved it (2508)
On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States
Today, I got into a car accident. I got into it because I noticed a flashy new sign on the highway that read "Being an attentive driver prevents car crashes". Thanks for the notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17442) - you deserved it (4448)
On 12/24/2009 at 11:08pm - health - by RoxMySox - United States (Texas)
Today, I called my boyfriend upset because my best friend has begun stripping to pay for school. His response was, "Where and what time does she work?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23856) - you deserved it (6262)
On 12/15/2009 at 4:49pm - love - by notcool (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30383) - you deserved it (2423)
On 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Yoooooo0 (woman) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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