Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TehCookieMonster

Offline (the 09/04/2014 at 7:54am) | Search for a member

TehCookieMonster

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3373
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

TehCookieMonster's page activity

Visits<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 4:24pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:45pm<b>GentlemanBastard</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:55pm<b>alicespoons</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:31pm<b>brookenicolee29</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 4:16pm<b>Ashamed_Sister</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 11:59pm<b>LoveMeDontHateMe</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 1:40pm

TehCookieMonster's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of TehCookieMonster's badges

TehCookieMonster's favorite FMLs

Today... I let my looool little sister sleep in my room because se ad a nigtmare. Se is currently snoring like an overweigt 40 year old man wit a cold. FML

#19105693
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21723) - you deserved it (2993)

On 02/18/2012 at 5:07am - misc - by sleepless - United States

TODAY, I WENT TO AN EXTENDD FAMILY REUNION . I STARTD CATTING TO MY GREAT GRANDPA, AND E ASKD MEAT I DO 4 A LIVING . BEFORE I COULD TELL IM I BRED ANIMALS, MY VISIBLY DRUNK DAD INTERRUPTD AND SLURRD, "O, SE JACKS TINGS OFF . HORSES, PIGS, JUST ABOUT ANYTING, REALLY." FML

#19102316
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26465) - you deserved it (3522)

On 02/17/2012 at 7:13pm - intimacy - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I Took Grandmother 4 A Spin In New Car. Apparently, She Had No Idea That Seat-warmers Exist And That Hers Was Turned On, Cuz Fifteen Minutes Into The Ride She Started Shouting, "My Ass Is On Fire!" Causing Me To Swerve Into A Pole. Big Fat FML

#19099160
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25819) - you deserved it (6912)

On 02/17/2012 at 8:25am - misc - by BOOP - United States (Montana)

Today, I found out that driving 4 2 weeks on 3/4 of a tank doesn't mean looool mah truck magically got more efficient, it means mah gas gauge is broken. FML

#19092080
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11703) - you deserved it (28962)

On 02/16/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Kramer - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, I GOT PULLD OVER. WHEN THE COP ASKEDHERE I WAS COMING FROM, REFLEXIVELY I SAID, ( YOUR MOM'S HOUSE. ) FML

Today , ma parents were out , so I lit up ma frst ever joint . I got so stond out of ma mind tat wen ma dad cummd back ome an askd wat te smell was , I said a stray cat ad left an upper-decker in te toilet . He found te joint in ma room , an now I'm groundd fir te rest of te scool year . FML

#19059244
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10242) - you deserved it (76395)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States

Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the looool wall an threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML

#19043614
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25838) - you deserved it (2716)

On 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm - misc - by rapper in training (man) - United States

Today, I was looking through some old family photos. I don't knowhat the hell was going on in mah head, but I idly double-tapped on one to zoom in. They were prints. FML

#19042625
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8435) - you deserved it (24917)

On 02/10/2012 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today , I got into a fist-fight with a wasp , aka a Nazi helicopter. Despite swiping at it with ninja-like skills , I lost. FML

#19040540
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7919) - you deserved it (25496)

On 02/10/2012 at 9:13am - animals - by Stung (man) - United Kingdom

Today, some looool guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me 4 "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML

#18998594
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28378) - you deserved it (1933)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:08am - misc - by dreefsa - United States (California)

TODAY, I WAS STANDING IN TE BATROOM AND FARTED. IT FELT LIKE SOMEONE STABBED ME IN TE BUTT. I JUMPED OUT OF SOCK, AND MY EAD SLAMMED INTO TE MIRROR. MY GLASSES FELL ONTO TE FLOOR AND BROKE. I NOW NEED NEW GLASSES, A NEW MIRROR, AND AN ICE PACK FOR MY EAD. ALL BECAUSE I FARTED. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23195) - you deserved it (9961)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Yesterday , mah boyfriend was flying his toy helicopter at mah head. It got stuck in mah hair an I now have a bald patch. FML

#18939799
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25556) - you deserved it (3149)

On 01/29/2012 at 1:31am - misc - by honey soy - Australia (New South Wales)

TODAY, I HAD TO WORK LATE. I MISSED THE LAST BUS SO I CALLED A CAB. THAT WAS 3 HOURS AGO. I CALLED MY DAD FIR A RIDE. THAT WAS 2 HOURS AGO. I GUESS I'M SLEEPING UNDER MY DESK TONIGHT. FML

#18922050
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27633) - you deserved it (2469)

On 01/27/2012 at 12:35am - work - by Wendizzle (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I passd out in the shower with mah boyfriend. He just left me there. FML

#18916162
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28155) - you deserved it (4675)

On 01/26/2012 at 2:09pm - love - by soawkward - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leand over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walkd away. FML

#18913819
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27340) - you deserved it (3808)

On 01/26/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by RequilaRainbow - Canada (British Columbia)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: