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Mobility
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Up and coming moderator
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22848) - you deserved it (2205)
On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21764) - you deserved it (1271)
On 10/25/2011 at 12:30am - work - by fire1 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was so bored at my job as a receptionist that I actually got excited when the phone rang. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17158) - you deserved it (2097)
On 10/24/2011 at 9:33pm - work - by anonymous - United States
Today, I proudly presented my research project in class that I've worked for day and night for 3 weeks straight. My teacher fell asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18155) - you deserved it (2193)
On 10/24/2011 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, marks the fourth straight night that my girlfriend has screamed and cried in fear, scratching and kicking me in her sleep. The reason? I took her to see Paranormal Activity 3. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11612) - you deserved it (34500)
On 10/24/2011 at 5:47am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I uploaded my latest picture onto a photography website. It only got one comment, and even that was from someone advising me to never use the same hideous model ever again. It was a self-portrait. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19844) - you deserved it (2931)
On 10/23/2011 at 2:05pm - misc - by fuglyphotographer (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26596) - you deserved it (2965)
On 10/23/2011 at 8:38am - love - by mrs.nerd - United States
Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34762) - you deserved it (14395)
On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada
Today, I found out the hard way that everyone in my dorm knows I watch My Little Pony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8723) - you deserved it (26182)
On 10/22/2011 at 4:25pm - work - by Brony - United States (Ohio)
Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17487) - you deserved it (11991) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I was relaxing at home while my boyfriend played with his hamster. After a while of silence, my boyfriend came over and put his fingers next to my face. Trying to be cute, I stuck his fingers in my mouth and sucked on them. Turns out he was trying to show me how bad hamster pee smells. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14397) - you deserved it (42713)
On 10/22/2011 at 2:10am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I have an ear infection, and everything I hear echoes inside my head. I'm an orchestra teacher, and we have our first concert next week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21881) - you deserved it (1848)
On 10/20/2011 at 12:44pm - work - by dolceconfuoco (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27051) - you deserved it (1742)
On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29971) - you deserved it (3238)
On 09/29/2011 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16119) - you deserved it (32343)
On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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