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TeenieAmerica's FML badges
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TeenieAmerica's favorite FMLs
Today, I was at the hairdressers getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML
by ugly / 04/15/2011 at 2:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
by FrOsTy25 / 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm / Miscellaneous
by a man / 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals
Today, I was looking in my grandparents' drawers and cupboards to find a blanket, but instead found a stash of sex toys, and a male G-string with a horse on the front. The best bit? When you press the horse's nose, it neighs. FML
by fuundmental/// / 04/09/2011 at 1:46am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/08/2011 at 12:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML
by American idol / 04/06/2011 at 2:19am / Miscellaneous
by Bailey / 04/05/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids
Today, my fiancé and I visited his family for dinner. The entire time I was there, his mother and sister had an in depth conversation about how attractive his ex girlfriends were and how they got along with them so well. FML
by BrisbaneCoop / 04/04/2011 at 1:13pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
by Hanna / 04/03/2011 at 1:55pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML
by Joe / 04/03/2011 at 3:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by JJMan217 / 04/03/2011 at 3:02am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by cantgetup / 04/03/2011 at 12:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I would be ecstatic if he hadn't stuck the ring on his balls and asked for a blow-job. He even confessed that the original plan was to stick it on his penis but it was too small. FML
by Angel1000168 / 03/27/2011 at 4:37am / Australia / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
by Anonymous / 03/26/2011 at 2:24am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…
- Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to… Today, at 11:30 p.m., after a 5-hour train journey to get back to Paris carrying a suitcase that’s… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was…