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TeenieAmerica's FML badges
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TeenieAmerica's favorite FMLs
Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML
by squirrels69ing / 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML
by SophieGray / 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm / United States (New York) / Animals
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/17/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
by Hahapasdroleleptit / 05/10/2011 at 10:56am / France / Kids
Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML
by Anonymous / 05/06/2011 at 2:09pm / Saudi Arabia / Intimacy
by Jims / 04/29/2011 at 10:00am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML
by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML
by Anonymous / 04/24/2011 at 12:10am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by gutted / 04/21/2011 at 4:33am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Miscellaneous
by doomed / 04/20/2011 at 10:45pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by rastafarimon / 04/17/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Username / 04/16/2011 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous